Hurr durr, I shit my pants.

Why did the chicken cross the road? How the hell should I know? I'm not a chicken :/

what is black and hangs from the tree in my back yard? a moldy apple.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? She is a woman.

Your mama is so fat, we are all severely concerned for her health

How was breakdancing inventented? From niggas trying to steal hubcaps of moving cars!

what did a poor guys get for christmast ? brain tumor.

Why is elmo sad? He was brutally raped by Dora :D

caoimhin is a dorty carrot

I dont think i could ever stab someone, I can barely get a straw through a capri sun

A man agreed with a camel. The camel didn't agree. ... (This joke does only make sense in the Dutch language.)

'Knock Knock' "Who's there?" 'Nobody. Your schizophrenia has become so bad you can barely make it through a normal day without emotionally collapsing. Your social life has dissolved into a world of fear, and your personal relationships have crumbled away before your eyes. Major depression and anxiety are eating you away. You have nothing left.'

Knock knock. Whos there? I am you dumbass im standing right next to you.

What did the therapist say to the other therapist? Your skin looks dry, let me lend you some ointment.

Q. Why did the man walk away from his wife? A. Because he wanted to walk away from his wife.

That akward moment when you tell a person you like them and they don't respond.

knock knock Goodbye

What happens when two elephants go out in the rain? They get wet.

What has 17 eyes, 43 toes, 11 feet and, 9 heads? A 17 eyed- 43 toed- 11 footed- 9 headed monster.

Get a life besides thumbing down statements telling you advice.........

What's the difference between a statue and a real human? The statue can't run if the birds shit on it.

A man walks into a bar and says "Ouch"

What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Robin, get in the Batmobile.

what is the difference between a white woman and a black woman.. i raped the black one

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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