What's worse then a missed call from your dad? A missed call from your mom.

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Baby Seal walks into a club.

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Why was the man weird... Stevie Wonder

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A man walks into a bar, muttering to himself. People stare at him because his severe Schizophrenia makes him stand out in social situations.

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What do you do when you find a black guy bleeding on your porch? You should call an ambulance! This man is hurt!

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Why was Timmy crying? Because he got raped in a van

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What do you call it when you have sex with a black man? Sex

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What did the cow say to the dog? Moo

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Thanks, I admire your sincerity, and I am happy to see that I got a lot more in common with you, than with well, my nerdy and geeky friends, which are not reading this here and now unless they are going against their orders and messing up their own work schedule. I just want you to know that I have fallen in love with you Nero, and if that is a problem for you, please let me know ASAP.

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Science debated on whether Dinosaur hide was like leather But though quite absurd They thought, like a bird Velociraptor was covered in feathers.

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Your mom is so ignorant that she in completely unaware how the premature termination of QE2 in conjunction with a potential US credit downgrade could substantially impact her fixed income portfolios and hinder her ability to retire in the desired time frame.

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Why did the cow cross the road? Cause he had madcow disease

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Why did the blonde arrest the man? Because he brutally murdered his wife and children.

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What do you call it when a multiple personality disorder person masturbates? Rape.

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What does it mean when the drummer drools out of both sides of their mouth? That they may have had a stroke and you should immediately call 911.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side

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Why can't Helen Keller read? Because she is dead.

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Roses are red,Here's something new ,violets are violets,not ******* blue

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What did the farmer say to the other farmer? "Uh... So, you're a farmer?"

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Correctional officer asks an inmate. "Does your elevator go all the way up"? Inmate replied. I don't know we always use the stairs.

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A woman walks up to a man in a supermarket and asks him where she can find the potatos. He says "I think they are all the way at the end on aisle 3" "Thanks" she says. Then she gets to aisle 3, and there aint no potatos!!!!

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Why do we have brown eggs? Because black people have sex with chickens

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A man gets a paternity test. It's better than beating his wife senseless due to his own insecurity.

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Why did the black man break up with his white girlfriend? Because he didn't love her anymore.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops