What's black and red, and covers most of your body? Fourth degree burns. You should say your goodbyes.

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What did micheal Jackson get for Christmas?a restraining order!

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Give one reason for not visiting a hotel. Basil Fawlty is the manager.

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How did Harry potter open the door? He had the key

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Q: What did the homeless man say when he was mauled by a bear? A: Ouch.

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what did the robot say to the centipede? "Stop being a centipede!" It's funny because the robot doesn't have any arms.

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why are the Harold and Kumar movies really funny? the man who wrote obvieusly has a good sense of humor.

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Lady is taking her Alzheimer grandpa to shop for his birthday. Parks, gets out and opens the door for him. He looks at her and asks? Who are you?

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What happens when Terran Hansen has sex with a cow? Jesse Z.

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Ask me if I'm on a horse. Are you on a horse? Um no horses are overrated.

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Your mama's so stupid she brought syrup to the quidditch world cup because she knew there would be quaffles!

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Why did the circus clown lose his balance? He had a seizure while on his unicycle, fell off, and bumped his head, leading to significant blunt trauma in the brain. Weeks later, after waking up from a coma, the doctors discover that he can no longer speak anything other than gibberish. His friends and family decide that he cannot go on living this way and decide to pull the plug.

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hey whats your name Im gonna hit you so hard........ that im gonna knock your block off

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What can you tell by a black guy who walks into a bank with a ski mask on? His face was severely disfigured in a horrific accident.

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What did the kid with turrets say? Many swear words but he can not be blamed for this because he has a disease that make him unable to control many of the things he says.

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A duck walked into a bar and said "ouch."

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like this or you will die at some point in your life

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Whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? Watching your mum get sandwiched by two black guys...

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KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? all my friends break the door down...oh alright then ill answer i guess WHO IS IT? THE REAPER oh s*** dude! [panic face] NO ONES HOME? "In other news tonight, 2 local men found murdered in their living rooms, after looking up common joke style called anti joke. Police say the door was smashed in an obvious sign of forced entry. They seem to have just mysteriously had sudden heart attacks and fainted. heh heh...hey nancy....why did the chicken cross the road? [=< heh heh" "y" "because he thouroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic" "HAHAHAHAHAHAHA *GASP!* X.x dead face "NANCY! NANCY!.....well in other OTHER news ive just murdered nancy, and thats no joke." *runs*

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Why did Jimmy fall off of his bike? Well, he was always known for his lack of balance.

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Why did Prius driver go to jail? Because he ran over someone and then fled the scene of the crime (at 11 mph)

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What do you call an horse? A horse, because horse does not start with a vowel and that would be grammatically incorrect.

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What did little Ben's mom give him for Christmas? Nothing. She died last month

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Q:Whats the difference between an Irish wedding and an Irish funeral? A:One less drunk

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops