Why are black people afraid of chainsaws? Because chainsaws are powerful machines, capable of dismemberment and death when wielded by someone who wishes to cause harm

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have to go to the bathroom.

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There once was a man from Nantucket, His dick was so long it caused tremendous physical discomfort, and it was extremely difficult for him to find pants that did not reveal his freakish abnormality, and greatly limited his levels of intimacy.

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A man walks in to a bar, what does he say? Ouch.

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A Jew walking in the street sees a homeless person asking for charity. He reaches to his pocket, grabs a penny, greets her with a nice smile and gives away the penny.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms and she was blind.

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A jewish man walks into a bar has a drink, then walks out of the bar.

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- I was at my house last night - I was at your MOM'S house last night... I'm her neighbor, she was having trouble with her plumbing and I thought i should help out

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, It's not my fault, I found you in a zoo!

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Why was the black man unemployed and in debt? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his opportunities from a young age.

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Why did the deer stop running? It was hit by a car

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I got pussies, cocks, asses and bitches. In my animal store.

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Rose are brown, Violets are brown, Who keeps pooping in my garden?

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what's worse than finding a worm in your apple? alot of things, worms don't taste that bad.

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"Hey ask me if i'm fat" "Are you fat" "Leave me alone"

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What's brown and sounds like a bell? An old rusted bell.

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Q: Why is it when geese fly in a V that one side is longer than the other? A: There are more geese on that side.

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A. Ask me if I am a tree B. Are you a tree? A. No idiot

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Why is Stevie Wonder always smiling? Because he has a great career and a loving family.

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How did the black guy swim across the Atlantic? He didn't. He was prepared to, but then went on Expedia and found a ticket with Continental Airlines that was in his budget. He did not like the amount of service he recieved, and decided in the future he will save up and fly with a different company, or in fact swim across.

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What is worse than a papercut? Losing your legs in Vietnam.

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Why couldn't the 10 year old see the Pirate Movie? Because his weekend was busy!

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How do you protect yourself from fire? Kill an orphan and nail its bones to your skin.

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Why was the chubby bird that you were staring at you angry. Because you were looking at him.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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