True fact: every rabbit lives their whole cute life.

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What's the hardest part of eating a vegetable? Putting her back in the wheelchair

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What's green and has wheels? A frog in a wheelchair

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Why did the old man throw the clock out the window? Because he didn't want to go to a store that could repair it, so then he thought that it was better off on his yard where it could compost.

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Why did the boy drop his ice-cream? He was shot in the back, knifed in the face, kicked in the groin, poo'd on by an alpaka, had frogs stapled to his face, his hair burnt off, pushed off a cliff, eaten by a scorpian, lost his arms legs and eyeballs, squashed by a hippo, ran over by a buss, truck and cement mixer, had cement poured on his frogs (that were stapled to his face), became morbidly obese, was raped by a chicken, was served as sauce at an italian resturant, was done by his mother's father's grandson, broke both of his detatched legs, crashed his car, went into a time machine and was crushed by a stegosaurous, had a lemon squesed in his detatched eyes, got high on cokeawana, was crushed to death by a garbage disposer and was rejected by the hobo at the shelter? no, actually, he tripped

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Roses are Red, Vilots are blue Im going to kill myself Bye

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Q: What's the answer to this question? A: The question to this answer.

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If life gives you melons, you have dyslexia.

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Knock Knock -Who's there? No one -Ok

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why are black people so fast? because there black

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What would you do for a Klondike bar? Pay a reasonable sum of money.

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Mike: Hey Dave knock knock Dave: Come in!

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You: Want to hear a joke? Person: Yeah You: Me too

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Q: Whats a spanish teacher who cant speak spanish A: duhh. it called an english teacher

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She's a woman

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What do you call a man who can't sing. Untalented and he should probably find a new profession

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what does a buttler put in a closet ? stuff.

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Red are roses, blue are violets I'm dislexic.

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What would you call Kenny Dalgleish if he was black? Depends on the situation. In a formal environment you would call him Mr Dalgleish, in an informal one it would be acceptable to call him Kenny, Kenneth or just Ken.

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What do you call a black man backfilping off a roof The dark knight

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What do you get when you cross a lion and a tiger? A Ligor.

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What did little Timmy get for Christmas after he was diagnosed with leukemia? A gift card to Bed Bath and Beyond because he was interested in redecorating.

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put my cøck in your mouth. Submitted by Arsha K.

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what smells like a rose bud? a rose, bud.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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