roses are red tulips are too, violets are violet, not freaking blue.

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You're mom is so slutty, she has sex with many men.

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Why can't black people swim? Many of them can. It's racist to assume that.

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Knock knock Who's there? Dave, I've got a fucking gun. Let me the fuck in.

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knock knock. Who is there? You have. You have who? Your entire family in my basement.

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If a man is called a manly man, what is a dude called? A dudely dude.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the dead one.

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Knock knock. Get out!!

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whaT DID HEVEN SAY TO THE FRIDGE hAVE YOU GOT A COLD

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What did the apple say to the banana? Nothing, apples can't talk

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I wear my sunglasses at night. I'm always getting into car accidents.

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How many babies can you fit in an oven? Depends how hungry you are.

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what did the boy with no arms and no legs get for christmas? A- a tv

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A Redhead, a Blonde, and a Brunette are all standing on top of a cliff in Ireland. They took a few pictures, and all in all it was a lovely vacation.

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A woman takes a shortcut through a dark alley. She is raped, robbed, and murdered. Her family mourns her death.

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Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

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What does Chuck Norris order at McDonalds? A Big Mac with a large fry and drink.

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Why couldn't the morbidly obese man get on a cruise ship? He didn't have a ticket.

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Knock Knock Who's There Lettuce Lettuce who? Lettuce down the street building his new garage

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Stephen hawking walks into a bar.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I haven't been able to deal Since the day that I lost you. Now these roses bleed red And these violets cry blue I think of you in memories Do you think of me too?

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Q: What's brown and sticky? A: Feces

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Where did the little boy go on vacation? His mother's funeral.

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two mormons missionaries knock on a door they are welcomed into the home and treated with kindness later the family is baptized. the mormons return home with a sense of accomplishment and purpose.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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