Q: What does a baby look like in a microwave? A: I don't know, I don't masturbate with my eyes open.

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Knock knock.Who's there?Dead Baby.

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Who is Dank? A: Billal

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What do you get when you shoot 3 cute kittens that have just walked into the house? 3 dead kittens

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Part 1 Q: what did Sally get for Christmas A: cancer Part 2 knock knock Who's there Not Sally MR

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Why did the little girl fall off of the swings? She had no arms... Why couldn't she get up? She had no legs... Why didn't anyone help her up? She had no friends... Why did she die? She landed in a puddle...

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why did everyone laugh at the kid in the wheel chair as he entered the room? he was poor

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Why did the little girl fall to death? Because pigs can't fly. It's impossible.

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Why does Obama not want to get buried? because he's still alive

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roses are grey violets are grey so says my color blind cousin

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What did Steve jobs tell bill gates? Please pass the salt.

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what did the panda say to the poachers? please stop killing my family.

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Why couldn't the T-Rex clap his hands? Because he's dead.

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what do you call a fat man standing in the middle of the street a fat man

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Your momma is so dumb she'd starve if she were trapped in a fully stocked grocery store. -Actually my mom has a pHD in Nutritional Science. If she were trapped in a fully stocked grocery store, she'd utilize that knowledge to maintain a balanced diet until a way was made available for her to return home.

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Parents who drive with children on their lap should be wrapped with a huge diapper

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If u give brandon a stick he will most likely poke u

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How do you kill a black person? Make them skydive 10,000 feet in the air without a parachute

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A pretty funny pick-up line that probably doesn't work: "Hey, do you work at Little Caesar's? Because you're hot and I'm ready.

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Whats the difference between a garage full of dead babies and a garage full of money? I don't have a garage full of money

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What is the difference between an apple and an apple? One has a brown spot.

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Did you hear the joke about the Israeli guy with the cruise missile down his pants? Me neither. I hope it's a good joke.

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Why did the baby die? Because I refused to feed it.

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Larry The Cableguy....thats it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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