Knock knock. Get out!!

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How do you steal from a sushi buffet? You say please.

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I saw a black dude eating fried chicken a white guy said he wanted some but the black guy said don't put your white mayonnaise on my fried delicious KFC fried chicken

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what did the oven say to the firdge you hot baby

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Q: What's worse than finding out you have genital herpes? A: Finding out your grandmother gave them to you

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What's the difference between an apple and a banana? One's an apple.

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what's funny about war? nothing!

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Chuck Norris.

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what does 2+2equals? i think its 3 but i could be wrong

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Timmy eats 32 cookies and eats 30 of them. What does he have? Type 2 Diabetes.

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A family walks into a talent agency. Talen agent says "Okay, what's your act called?" Dad replies "The Aristocrats!"

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How does a cancer patient bathe? He can't because he lives in an arid climate where water is scarce.

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What do a baby and popcorn have in common? They both pop in an explosive manner when put in a microwave and both can be consumed by the person who may have put the baby and popcorn in it so if you think this is funny then you have some problems and i will shortly in some period of time when my schedule is cleared refer you to a licensed psychologist and we will make an appointment for you.

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What is Godzilla's favorite sport? Nothing, Godzilla is a fictional character.

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what's the only thing funnier than a dead baby nailed to a tree? The look on the mom's face.

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9-11 please state your emergency. My house is flooding! Dad, youre in the swimming pool.

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What is the biggest killer in America? Death.

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What did the boy with no arms or legs get for Christmas many gift card to stores he liked

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A priest, a nun and an Irishman walk into a bar. The barman says 'what is this, a joke?'

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How many dead babies can you fit a bathtub??? It depends on how you slice them!

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Why was Jimmy so upset? Because both of his parents died.

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What did the strawberry say to the elephant? Nothing. Because it's a strawberry and strawberries can't talk.

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What's black and white and red all over? A black, white, and red shirt.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops