How do you turn a fruit into a vegetable? A car crash.

full house should of been called black jack, because the Olsen twins started getting hit on at age 8 and didn't stop til they were 21

blargen fa-diddle nachen!

A zebra walks into bar, the surrounding customers in the bar become very intrigued why this exotic creature has wandered from Africa into New york. Before they can come to a concluson animal control opens fire on the creature, splatering its organs onto the tables. This event ruined the night for most customers and they fileout of the bar calmly but sad

A grammatically correct mushroom walks into a bar. The bartender says, "We don't serve mushrooms." The mushroom says, "Why not, I'm a fungus."

A man walks into a bar, he then gets a giant bump on his head as he passes out and is rushed to the hospital.

What did the plane say to the other plane? Boy, those towers fall!

wanna hear a joke? womans rights

your mama so fat she has a low self esteem

How many black people can you fit into a cardboard box? Depends on how big the box is.

why did the kid fall down the stairs? he had polio

knock knock... who's there... i dont know i aint got a house

What do you call a Jew A Jew

What did the farmer say when the potatoes were ready for harvest? The potatoes are ready for harvest.

Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants? It was probably a cold day.

What's worse than the holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

No soup for you!

Two fuses wearing bombs for hats were sitting on a bench with their frayed feet dangling on the ground. A match was walking along and tripped, hitting it's head on the ground and bursting into flame. Luckily the fuses had finished lunch by that time and gone back to work. Unluckily for the match it died from burns to 80 percent of it's body.

whats similar between a chicken and an alligator they both gobble except for they alligator

Three men are sitting in a tub. One of them says "Toss me the soap." The second one says "Toss me the shampoo." The third one says "Toss me the toaster."

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sally

Why did Suzy fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Suzy.

What did the fish say when he ran into a wall? Fish don't run.

What did the man dying of cancer want for his birthday? To live.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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