I contracted AID's from a prostitute So I went out and killed 4 gay since they are the most prominent carriers of the disease I also killed a black man I kill a black man everyday

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Barak Obama, Justin Bieber, and Lindsey Lohan all jump out of a plane. all of their parachutes deploy. except Justin Bieberrs, he then dies of cancer

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what do mexicans cross? whatever they want. but in this case their local grocery store parking lot to buy fresh produce.

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What is the difference between my pet goldfish and an african village? My pet goldfish has water.

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How do you get a jewish girls number check her wrist

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johnny goes to the shops asks the lady at the counter, can i go home The Lady says ..... Buy one get one free

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What's the difference between and orange? The horse wasn't wearing a saddle.

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Good friends are like snowflakes. They disappear when you pee on them.

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One time i was sitting down

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What did the sailor say to the shore? Ur a beach!

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What did the Taliban teenager strap on his chest before getting on the bus? A blue rubber dildo.

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What did the man say when he put his penis in the blender? Arghhhhhhh!

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Why did the little boy let go of his balloon? Because I was raping his face.

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knock knock whos there? ughh omg youre dying what yeah dear god ok ill call 911 no im fine its just a seizure ok get well soon

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See now, that is because you consider yourself my submissive on a both concious and subconcious level, your body and mind wants me to take care of you. I could say it is because I read minds, but why read minds, when I can create them, why read the future, when you can create it. Finally, lets take a look into the word, nerve endings yes? Not nerve endings baby, its called Suggestion. But seriously though, lets put the word nerve endings on top of the word suggestions again there. Nerve endings, did I mention it works on your butt too? You see, usually you would say no, but you do know that now that I am your master, you do and enjoy as I say? See you baby. Moral: "Feel the grove, I control the way you move"

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A man walks into a bar and asks the bartender can you throw me a beer and the bartender says yes and he throws him the beer and the man says I can't catch I have the smallest hands in the world and the bartender says go across the street there is a guineas book of world record store an check if you h e the smallest hands and he does so the next day he goes back and asks for another beer and the bartender throws him a beer and say I cant catch cause I have the smallest feet in the world and he goes across the street and checks and he does and then the third day he goes back to the bar and asks for a beer and the bartendor throws him another beer and says I can't catch I have the smallest penis in the world so he goes to the guiness book o world record store and then goes bac to the bar and asks..... Who's austin bell?????

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How many Ringmasters does it take to change a lightbulb? None. They tell the clowns to do it

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? -Because he was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? -He was stapled to the first one Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? -He thought it was a game Why did the refrigerator fall out of the tree? -He had no arms Why did the girl fall off her bike? -She was hit by 3 monkeys and a refrigerator

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If anything is possible try to staple water to a tree.

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My life has been getting worse and worse since I developed cancer.

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Why didn't the scientist discover a cure for apathy? He simply lost interest in it.

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What did the penguin do in the desert? Die.

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What do you call a cat in a piece of bred? An inbred cat.

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Why are you gay? Because ***** you

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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