Elephants can jump higher than the tallest building. You know why? It's because buildings can't jump.

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How do you stuff a giraffe into a refrigerator? You can't, giraffes are too big.

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Why was lil' Susie screaming horrifically? Nobody knows. That's why the neighbors called the cops. -Harrison

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You know what's funny? You got AIDs

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What do you get when you cross a badger and a paper bag? The badger is cross of course but the bag is inanimate and can't be angered.

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Two clarinets were locked in a case for 20 years. They both play well.

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How did the clown crash his car? A horrible tornado chrashed through the town.

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What fruit is used to make apple juice? Apples

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Wanna know a secret? I didn't read or agree to the terms and services

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What would a gay man do with a jelly doughnut? Thoroughly enjoy its fruity taste.

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Why did the kid lay down? Because his legs were chopped off

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Why did the girl blush when she opened the fridge? Because she saw the salad dressing

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A man wakes up after a long night with a girl he recently met. He pulls out a cigarette, and looks for his lighter, but can not find it. He asks the girl if she has a lighter and she replies "There might be some matches in the top drawer of my dresser." He opens the top drawer and finds some matches.

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Whats worse than pulling down a girls pants and seeing a giant furry bush... finding out her vagina has teeth in it.

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what did the mother say to the banana? I'm going to eat you like your father.

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Tom: Knock knock! Guy: Who's there? Tom: Carrot. Guy: Impossible.

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Coming this fall, A hilarious movie for the whole family to enjoy, actor Rob Schneider play a very normal man would goes to work everyday to support his family who he loves more than anything in the world, critics are saying that this is the most vulgar slapstick comedy of the year as Rob Schneider teaches his two adopted kids the power of Jesus Christ. Coming this fall... The Nun's Birthday Rated R for excessive nudity of Rob Schneider and an asian hooker.

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A man walks into the bar and orders a drink. This is what you do in a bar.

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Why did John get hard? He froze to death

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Why did the old man get the anti aging cream ? He failed 8th grade 50 times.

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What's black and white and red all over? I don't care I have AIDS

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Q:How do you get better at boxing? A:Get a bigger package Daniel W. Schnurr

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Someone just commented on my joke! ... oh wait it was myself

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Hi im a joke i eat turtles

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops