It was Jimmy's 18th bday so his parents let him have the house to himself. He ate shrooms, fucked his turtle, then had his dick bitten off.

What did the boy with no arms or legs get for Christmas many gift card to stores he liked

The new Minons film reminds me of most foreign films.. You can't undertand a fucking word they say and they're all yellow

Two pen state administrators walk into a butt

whats worse than the black death. Bieber Fever

Roses are red, violets blue, um... that's all i got.

Why is it unpleasant to eat a meal with lots of basketball players? Because they will be focussing entirely on discussing tactics (especially if there is an upcoming game), and therefore will probably not be displaying good manners or making polite mealtime conversation.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 brutally raped and murdered 32.

What did the frat guy drink after he lifted? A various assortment of beverages that were chilled at a cool 66 degrees.

Why did the depressed man jump off the bridge? Because bungee jumping is a great activity to relieve stress.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Not to a blind guy.

whats worse than a paper cut? getting your head chopped off

Who lived in a pineapple under the sea?

An English ship lands in the New World and offers to trade with the natives. The ship actually carried foreign diseases that the natives had no immunity to, and they all died.

What do you call a bunch black people falling off a cliff? A mudslide! What do you call a bunch of white people falling off a cliff? An avalanch!

Why did the cow hail a taxi? Because cows can't drive.

whats bad about being black and jewish they have to sit in the back of the oven

Jimmy can't drive the tractor. Why can't Jimmy drive the tractor? Because he's a patato

Sarah Jessica Parker walks into a bar. Bartender asks her, "why the long face?". She tells him it's from her parent's genes.

How does a black man spell Jack J-A-C-K

Why did the world end? Because of Jim Layhey's whispering winds of shit.

Yar! What be a pirate's favorite football team? The Steelers. I'm originally from Pittsburgh.

Why does the cow eat grass? A: Because it's green. (Cows are colorblind)

There once was a man from Madrass Whose balls were made out of brass This was incredibly uncomfortable and embarrassing for him. It also affected his sexual potency and rendered him infertile, Which drastically affected his ability to enter and sustain relationships with women.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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