what did the judge say to the lawyer during a trial. He said We are all in a court. thus concluding that the judge was retarted.

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Whats worse than getting in an arrow in the side of your neck Finding out there is a gas bill tied to it

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was being raped and was fugitive lot trying to escape, to no avail.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well for a chicken to cross a road there would need to be a farm right next a road and, the fence in the farm would have to be torn for the chicken to get out and the chicken would probably end up not crossing the road because of cars.

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What looks like a penis, smells like a penis and eats penis Nothin ive ever seen

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If you have 5 bucks and Chuck Norris has 5 buck you both have 5 bucks

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Q: What happens when eight men throw purple at a rain coat? A: Mud-flaps, because electricity can't power a vagina.

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a boy jumps off a building why? because he's afraid of heights

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Why was six afraid of seven? Back when seven was in Vietnam, he sufferd Posttraumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) and constantly has flash backs and irrational thoughts of six being with the veitnamese alliance and tries to viciously molest six whenever he runs out of anxiety medication.

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What's black and blue and made of poo? A drowning black guy, holding some blue poop

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Two penguins, sitting in a bath tub. One says, "Pass the soap!" The other says, "What do you think I am?! A clock?"

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If I could Rearrange the alphabet, i would put U and Q together.

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A man copied someone else's joke on anti-joke, people looked at it and said "That's funny, but they copied it", then they moved on to the next one.

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Why did the baby die? Because you had sex with it when it was only 1 years old.

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Why was the little boy crying? He had a frog stapled to his forehead. Why did the little boy have a frog stapled to his forehead? Because Johnny just can't drive. Why can't Johnny drive? He has no arms and legs. Why does Johnny have no arms and legs? Cause Johnny is a potato! Why did Timmy drop his ice cream? Because he got ran over by a bus. But who was driving the bus? Johnny the potato!

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three black teenagers went to the cinema to watch twilight

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If you die, and have 5 cents in your pocket, does the toast still land jelly side down?

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Reclu. Reclu who? Recluse Spider.

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A man walks into a bar. He orders a drink.

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Whats orange at the bottom of the swimming pool? A baby without floaties.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, my life didn't start, until I met you! :) Megan _____

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Son come here OK daddy Daddy what are you doing DADDY NO! DADDY NO!

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Q: What did the bus driver say to the black man? A: Nothing, he simply greeted him with a nod, as he would do to any other person who chose to ride the bus.

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What's the difference between Paris Hilton and a cow? Cows are ruminants, meaning that they have a digestive system that allows use of otherwise indigestible foods by regurgitating and rechewing them as "cud". Paris Hilton, on the other hand, is a human being. Therefore, her stomach digests the bolus (masticated food) only after it has exited the oesophagus into the body of the organ, where it is digested into chyme and then passed through the pyloric sphincter into the duodenum.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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