A blonde went to a doctor for a checkup. The blonde couldn't hear the doctor 'cuz she had headphones on so the doctor took them off. A couple of minutes later she died. The doctor was curious so he put the headphones on. It was saying, "Breathe in, breathe out. Breathe in, breathe out..."

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Whats the difference between pizza and a Jewish person? Pizza doesnt scream when being put into an oven.

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What are the similarities between aaron ash and a cow? they both have 7 stomachs.

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Why did the cat cross the road? he wanted to be a docter.

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What starts with P and ends with ORN? Porn

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The optimist sees the glass as half full. The pessimist sees the glass as half empty. The average American sees a half-finished glass of water that is not flavored and is therefore is not worth any reasonable person's time.

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What's the difference between ?2 and and 74^3? ?-405242.585786

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What's the deal with airline food? Food tastes different on an airplane. The atmosphere dries out your nose, the air pressure numbs 1/3 of your taste buds, and low humidity levels give you cotton mouth. These factors cause the food to taste worse than it normally would.

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Q: Buttsex? A: Butsex!

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BRANDON LUI ROCKSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

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A jewish man walks into a bar has a drink then walks out of the bar ...

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What would you do when pigs fly? Pigs cannot fly, therefore this question is impractical.

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a cat gets mauled by a dog. it died later that day

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A child finally stood up to the school bullies! Recently the news did a story about a school shooting.

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How many blondes does it take to play a game of hide and seek? One ... ;)

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A man walked into a bar....he's OK.

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Once i tried to do math ! She wasn't getting wet so i stopped!

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Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall Humpty Dumpty had a great fall Humpty Dumpty is an egg so nobody cares

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What's worse then spilling milk? Instantaneous Human Combustion

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Q: Why did Captain Kirk suck his own dick? A: Nobody else was around, I guess.

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Why did Gina laugh? Because something was funny.

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At the Asthma hotline. Caller: Aahhh aahhh *gasp* *gasp* I need you... Woman: *slams phone* DAMN I WISH THESE PERVERTS WOULD STOP CALLING!

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how do you kill a blonde with a pistol Put the clip in and shoot her

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Roses are red Violets are blue You don't want to be my valintine I'm going to shoot myself.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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