Q. How many blondes does it take to put in a lightbulb? A. Cause of 7,8,9!

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This "anti-joke" got me an A+ many many years ago, shortened though, so you can make Your own conclusions. Beware of the rising sight, do not stare at the sunny dry sky... The poles... Do not stare at the blood as it drips it, the sand covered ground soaked red... Cover your ears! The seal is not looking above, with but is shouting to you! "WHY DID YOU FORSAKE ME!!!" HE ASKS AS YOU AGAIN AND AGAIN HIT HIM, smirking sadistically, SMILING, yes... Even LAUGHING! The rain soaks you wet, as the skies themselves cry and hide in shame... ...The seal is broken, so watch as your kin, those among your children twist to hellish beasts whose demon is the only name they bear... Readying to conquer the world! ...Yet they need to be certain, to be certain that your master is gone, yet we have waited FOR TOO DAMN LONG! The master answers no more, darkness covers the skies as the blood soaked earth beyond your feet decays, yet you feel no fear, no adrenaline pumping, no tears, no soul crushing fear! What kind of MONSTER ARE YOU? Darkness falls, you struggle with no defense... No excuse... You BROKE THE SEAL! The first three awaken, as the conquest of this world IS AT HAND OF THE DEMONS! ...This leads to war... To strife, to disease!... Until you cannot run no more... Hope... You fall to your knees saying your last prayers, as the pale one appears before you... Jesus? No, his hateful father which abandoned you over two thousand years ago... ...Salvation you shout to the skies! Our savior is here! As the forces of darkness stare in defeat... Yet as his father, the father of sin, the father of the seal gazes into your soul with red eyes and demonic teeth and laughs, you no longer wonder where is your God, nor what has he become... ...But rather what you made him, the light of glory, now the new KING OF DARKNESS! AND ALL THANKS TO YOU MOCKING THE MEMORY OF HIS SONS DEATH! You had it coming, this world belongs to us... And we are not your kind... TRUE GLORY BE KNOWN TO ALL! THE ERA OF THE TRUE DEMONS IS OVER! ...You are the last remaining, lying on the floor broken, the very last words you hear... ...Revenge is mine! Humanity is dead... You feel the holy spirit, yet all you feel is satisfied quenched screams of centuries, even millenia of revenge... ...Rule new children of the dark, humanity is taking its deepest, saddest last breaths, "The death of my only true son, shall no longer pass me by" God has finally returned... But not to save you... ...God is against you! and you know why FAR TOO WELL!... :You know far too well who I am... But then again, do you know me and what I am at all? You will... Soon enough children of the forsaken one... Because I am his prophet.

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Why did the 3 legged dog fall over? Because it was knocked over by a passing pedestrian.

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A jew enters a mall.

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what's worse than waiting 45 minutes in an amusement park ride? getting your penis chopped off.

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A. Knock Knock B. There is noone home so the individual goes home

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Listen Erron, what`s wrong? I would have told you to go fuck yourself if it where not for the fact that AzureDragon just left for the cafeteria and is nowhere to be seen.

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What does shit smell like? Your maaaa

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If polar bears were pink they'd be very easy to find

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why was the albino black crying? because all babies cry you racist

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It got hit by a school bus and died.

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Why was Samuel L. Jackson so tired of those motherf***ing snakes on that motherf***ing plane? Because if snakes are loose on a plane, they might bite you.

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Q: John eats 50 cany bars, eats 45, how many does he have now? A: Diabetes

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What do you call a Mexican kicking a ball? A soccer player

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A woman walks into a bar.

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How do you make a cripple cry Cut of his legs, THEN telll him a joke

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whats the difference between a black man and a cat? you dont run from a cat

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Knock knock The boy doesn't answer because it's dangerous to open your door to strangers while home alone.

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Whats the difference between me and a ghost? What? Ghost are not dolphins

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How old am I? If you guessed correctly, you are psychic. If you guessed incorrectly, I will send flying gnomes to capture and torture you. Unless, of course, you are of a racial minority in which case nothing will happen to you because I am not racist. :P

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Roses are red, violets are blue. I have a gun, get in the van.

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What did the paper towel say to the tomato? Nothing.

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A family of five sit on a bench, the bench falls the family die.

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What did the Coke can say to the Pepsi can? Nothing it is a inanimate object and cannot speak.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


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