TOFFEES HEAD LYING IN THE GRASS

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What's big or small, can come in different colors, and would kill you if it was forced inside you? A refrigerator.

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Remember when Jesse Ziegenbein was skinny? yeah niether do I

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what's bloody and sweet? A squashed mosquito sprinkled with sugar.

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Anti-Joke is a sticky wicket.

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Boys go to college to get more knowledge, girls go to Jupiter... Actually I lied, girls go to the kitchen

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So there was this cracker sitting on a bench. A pigeon picked it up and flew off. Probably ate it afterwards.

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To tell the truth... Your really an abortion that grew

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Why do gingers smell so bad? So the blind can hate them too

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What's the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa? Tiger woods is a famous golf player and Santa is a fictional old man dressed in red and white who is said to live in Lapland, have an airborne sleigh driven by eight magical reindeer and come down the chimney to fill childrens' stockings on Christmas eve.

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why did the black guy die? cancer

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Roses are cars, violets are rude, this poem makes no sense, neither do you

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What's brown and liquidy? Brown paint.

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what did god say when we made his first nigga oops i acidenlty burnt it

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have Alzheimer's And add extra pepperoni

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Nero7 How are you doing? This is "Eliza" I hope I will be joining, but I cannot reach you by phone, please respond ASAP time is running out.

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roses are blue violets are blue everything is blue I'm sad now

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Why couldn't the teen go to the prom? He was busy working to help his mom recover from breast cancer.

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Haikus are easy. But sometimes they don't make sense. Refrigerator.

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why does david stutter during meetings. because he smiles till his cheeks hurt

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because there were no cars in the way.

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Why didn't the busy San Francisco business man hear his alarm clock ring this morning? A nuclear bomb blast occurred 700 meters from his front door. The estimated blast radius was approximately 100 square miles. Naturally, his alarm clock didn't make it.

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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How many cops does it take to change a light bulb? None. They just beat it for being black.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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