How many dead babies can fit in a barrel? 4 1/2

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How did the cookie monster die? Diabidies

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What did the little boy with a terminal illness get for Christmas? A gun

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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A blind man walk in to a bar... He then yells a 4 letter explative, backs up, and walks around it.

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Yo momma's so hot I raped her and slit her throat afterwards and hid her body in a ditch.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have schizophrenia And so do I..

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To suck my dick

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The awkward moment when you are reading these jokes and either it's not funny or you don't get it...

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Brother: Where is my Guitar? Me: To the Left to The left Brother : No its not Me: Everything you own in the box to the to the left Brother : Im telling Mom Me: In the Closet Thats my stuff and if i bought please don't touch Brother: *Opens Closet* This is all Mine! Me: *Takes off headphones*? Huh? Brother: Nevermind - _ -

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Why is Lindsay Lohan out of prison? No, I'm asking.

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What is the french word for penis? I cannot say because I do not possess an adequate knowledge of the language.

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Daisies are red, OH SHIT! MY GARDEN'S ON FIRE!!!

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"Do you like pie?" "No." "Do you like blueberries?" "No." "I have something you won't like." "Is it a blueberry pie?" "No, I shagged your wife last night".

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Why did the goat cross the road. To put his sacrifices into the pentagram.

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Why couldn't the boy see the pirate movie? Because it was sold out

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Two Holocausts.

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A man walks into a bar. It hurt.

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how do u make a snooker table laugh? TICKLE ITS BALLS HAHA

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What do you call two dog? dogs

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what has wheels and is red. A heart, i lied about the wheels.

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Why are all the other numbers scared of 7? Beacuse 7 stabbed his mother with a steak knife.

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Wanna hear a dirty joke? The pig rolled in the mud!

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EVERYBODY has a penis!!! Everybody!!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops