What do you call a dog that has no legs? It doesn't matter because he will never come.

A drunk walks out of a bar gets in his car and proceeds to drive home the driver passed out at the wheel swerved in the wrong lane and smashed the car of the Jefferson family a young family of 4, the Jefferson family's car exploded into flames while the drunk sat back laughed and rubbed the wound on his head

what kind of sex did ethan have? webcam sex

Knock knock. Who's there? Andy. You're late, I've been piss-arsing about waiting for you to get here.

What does Jason say when he rages on cod ? I hope your family gets slaughtered in front of him ..

Why couldn’t the bicycle stand up on its own? The kickstand was broken and the child whom of which owned the bicycle no longer had the need for training wheels.

Why did the girl fall off the swings? -because she had no arms

How do you know when your pizza is ready? When the oven timer goes off, indicating that it is done.

What's worse than a worm in your apple? Having a self-conscious baluga hold a gun on you while you hand him all the money you have on you, then realizing balugas are creatures indigenous to aquatic regions, and then realizing you are deep under water and are probably about to die from suffocation

what did the apple say to the orange ? nothing, apples are a fruit and do not have any organs which allow it to be able to talk.

which is faster a) ferrari b) beetle a ferrari

Why did the girl call suicide hotline? Cuz he wanted to kill herself.

I wumbo, you wumbo, he she me,.WUMBO!

whore whore whore whore whore whore whore whore whore whroe whore whore whore whroe

What is the difference between a circle and a cylinder? dunno

Why did the Cross chicken the road? Because it wasn't the way to the Lord

Whats faster than a mexican running down the street with your TV? An airplane

What did the black guy say to the white guy? Hi!

what's worse than finding a worm in your apple? rape

How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? First of all, babies do not have the physical ability or the mental capacity to ever paint a wall, no matter how many of them there are. Second of all, they are dead which probably will not increase their chances of painting said wall.

Hey i just met you and this is crazy but your adopted banana

knock knock who's there? ketchup ketchup who? better catchup with me!

OK, Billy went to his friend Fred in the tree. And then went inside to get a snack. Then Fred fell out of the Tree and.....landed on a comfy mattress.

#Getweird

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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