Once there was an egg by the name of Steve. His name was Steve the Egg.

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What do you get when you throw a bagel at a chicken? One less bagel.

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What do you call it when a black man kills an Asian man? Murder.

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What's the difference between an elephant and a plum? Their color. What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the elephants over the hill. What did Jane say when she saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the plums over the hill. She was color blind.

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What did Joe get for his first birthday? Nothing he died at birth

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WWII veteran screamed! "You damn yellow monkey" "But sir... ...my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a registered SIX offender

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Why is a bird when it flies? Because the higher it goes the much.

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Q: What do you call a vacuum that doesn't suck stuff up? A: A broken vacuum.

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What did the surgeon say to the patient? Nothing. The patient died on the table.

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What do a bicycle and a platypus have in common? They both have wheels, except the platypus doesn't.

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A boy plays in his garden. Then he fall and his knee hurts a lot, but he doesn't cry. Do you know why? Because he's dead.

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A horse walks into a bar. He politely holds the door for a young woman.

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I stepped into the bathroom and began to take a shower. Then, I panicked. I was so thirsty, and I did not take the advantage to drink some water before I stepped into the bathroom. But then I realized: "Wow, I am so silly. I am standing under the shower, so I could easily just expedite my washing and drying, exit the bathroom, get dressed, and grab something to drink from the kitchen!" Then I showered quickly and got something to drink.

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What did you call something that is long, hard and full of seamen? A ship.

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If you say "Hi" to every tree you pass, is that being environmentally friendly?

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When the poop hits the fan and you walk in with your pants around your ankles, it's a bad sign!

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Kid: Mom I'm gonna dig a hole all the way to China! Mom: That's sweet but it's impossible dear. You'll get to tired after awhile to go any farther. Also, by any chance you did dig really deep, you would melt and die if you got the the center because the magma will kill you when you get to it. Alright son? Kid: What?

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What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? "We are both lawyers."

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What did the boy with no mom get for Christmas? He was beaten by his drunken and abusive father.

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I'm a vegan thats why I am still a Virgin.

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Whats worse than finding a repeated joke on anti joke? The holocaust Whats worse than finding a repeated joke on anti joke? The holocaust

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an old lady walked into a bar, used the bathroom and left. THE END

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops