KEVIN CRUMMY SMELLS LIKE SARAHS (I)

Ben Corbishley

Why can't Micheal J Fox draw a perfect circle? Because he has Parkinsons..

Why did Dom move to Wales? Because he is poor!

A man is walking down the street in Chicago. A man in a car pulls up next to him and asks him, "Excuse me sir, how do I get to Carnegie Hall?", at which the man on the street said, "Go straight here, turn onto Birch, follow that to the second stop light, then turn left on Main, big complex, can't miss it." "Thank you!"

A man walks into a bar. He sits down and orders a drink. The bartender gives him a drink. The man walks out of the bar. He drives home and slaps his wife. Alcohol is destroying his marriage.

What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the Batmobile? Robin, get into the Batmobile.

Why is six afraid of seven? Six isn't actually afraid of seven. It is true that seven devoured nine's carcass, but one has to understand that cannibalism is not a taboo in their culture. In the world of cardinal numbers, protein is precious and leaving corpses to rot is dangerously unsanitary. You should not judge them by the standards of human society. It's ignorant and offensive.

Polly went out for a fag. Then she was raped.

Why couldnt the man stop dancing? He had Parkinson's.

What do you call a fish with no I Defected at birth

How old is victor? Half past dead

A horse walks into a bar. The barman says 'who the f*ck let a horse in here, get it out now'.

Two bars walk into a guy, and the bartender says, "You're telling the joke wrong, stupid!"

Why did hundreds ofnpeople die in a plane crash? Because the pilot was a salad.

Do you know whats funny to say to someone unless they're black. Your ma's in jail.

Once a upon a time there was a girl named Cinderella. She rubbed a magic lamp and a genie appeared. Then a guy named Larry Harry walks into a laundry mat. 7 days later she died.

Steve is getting paid $29.50 to bounce a ball Steve is getting fired monday

What did the one stethoscope say to the other stethoscope? Nothing. Stethoscopes can't talk.

What's worse than 50 dead babies stapled to trees? 47 dead babies stapled to trees (it's better if it's a nice, round number.)

What did the man with no arms or legs get for Christmas? A bike

I dyed my armpit hair blue yesterday because I wanted to start a new trend. My boyfriend later broke up with me.

Q-How do you kill an elephant? A- An elephant gun Q- How do you kill a blue elephant? A- A blue elephant gun Q- How do you kill a red elephant? A- Strangle it until it turns blue then use a blue elephant gune Q- How do you kill a purple elephant? A- Don't be ridiculous purple elephants don't exist

What is green, has four legs, and if it falls out of a tree and onto your head, it will kill you? A pool table.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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