Don't you just hate it when a sentence doesn't end the way you octopus?

thumb_up thumb_down +5

what has 8 legs, is brown, and will bite you? my crap

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A black man is trapped inside a bottle, how does he get out? He doesn't it is simply impossible for a human to get trapped inside a bottle.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

If these walls could talk - the public would pay large sums of money to see this marvel of science. On a more serious note, they might also tell the cops about the many dead hookers stowed within them.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Get a life besides thumbing down statements telling you advice.........

thumb_up thumb_down +5

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? the holocaust

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why did the chicken cross the road I don't know

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Kid: My dad's brother has gone at it with a lot of women. Friend(sarcastically): Geez that's great! When was he born? Kid: '69

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What's the cure of cancer? Death.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Where do cows go in their free time? burger king.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why did the chicken cross the playground? Because he was looking for other chickens because he has no friends and he got bullied when he was in 12th grade. He got picked on because he was sledding down his hill in his backyard and he accidentally scraped one side of his face on ice and started bleeding. The next day his classmates started calling him two face.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Last Christmas, I gave you my heart, But the very next day, I died.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Whats more dangerous then a man with a gun? two men with guns.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

How do you help a one-armed man down from a tree? Wave.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

MURRRY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why did the first Monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the second Monkey fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the first Monkey. Why did the bird fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A cow and a whale are swimming in the sea when they both realize this is Vietnam and they were really chimps

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What do Barney and a butchers knife have in common? One of them is purple

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why does Magic Johnson have to use extra-large condoms? Because he's got a giant dick and HIV.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

what is big, white, and can't climb a tree? a fridge

thumb_up thumb_down +5

why can't dead peaple have sex? because they're dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Knock Knock "Who's there?" "This is Frank from Walside Windows just wondering if you wou..." (Door Slams Shut) "Damn those people are annoying"..

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house?!?! Neither has he

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why didn't the 1 month old chicken cross the road? Because by that time it's already a Mcnugget.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops