kennah campion when she talks

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Why doesn't Jonathan Walk across the road? Because he is in a wheelchair...

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What do you call a Mexican who steals cars? John Doe, until he's been identified.

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What do blind people see when they close one eye? Nothing.

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Q: What's the difference between a trampoline and a baby? A: I take off my shoes when I jump on a trampoline.

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Why does a man have a closet full of fruits? Because he has a mental illness and there is nothing to laugh about.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Who Who who? Hoodini

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Why did the Mexican cross the road? He was on his way to America Why did the black man cross the road? He was just running to his car you racist.....after he had robbed the bank

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What's worse than dropping a dollar down the drain? Getting constantly tortured for hours non-stop by getting your eyebrows plucked out one by one and getting your teeth pulled out and getting your arms cut open by a razor and getting your nose twisted off and getting your nipples ripped off by a pair of pliers and getting your toenails scraped off by a knife and getting a needle shoved into your eyes and getting a sword stuffed up your arse and getting your penis split in two like a hotdog and getting your balls smashed up by a sledgehammer so the sperm inside goes everywhere. I think that would be worse than dropping a dollar down the drain.

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Salt is brown, Pepper is white, my kitchen is in a mess.

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Why did the chicken croos the road? He was battling severe depression at the time. His alcoholism was tearing his family apart, he was declining in job performance and his boss threatened to fire him several times. I guess at that point he just decided to end it all. It was horribly tragic, policemen knocking on the door of his wife's chicken roost and informing her of the bad news. As soon as she heard, she rushed to the scene, only to see his mangled body spread across the street, intestines falling out. They held a closed casket funeral. Formal, all black. It was raining by the time the casket was brought to the cemetery to be buried. She hasn't stopped crying since. His children ask her, where's dad, but all she can do is weep. Suicide is bad, kids

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Q: How many dead babies can you fit in a bath tub? A: This question has many different possible answers due to the range of sizes and shapes of bath tubs available on the market, and also depending on the size of the baby in question. It is therefore only possible to give a specific example.

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What's sad about a girl getting hit in the face with a shovel? The shovel got dented..

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how do you kill justin bieber? put a bag over his head and suffercate him.

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http://media.photobucket.com/image/whale%20penis/marcus1v0/whale_penis2.jpg

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person 1: hey! guess what? person 2: what? person 1: i once saw a brown polar bear

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A British man walks into a dentist's office.

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What did Marshawn Lynch say? Yeah

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telll someone to ask u if u are a tree then say nooooooo

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whats worse than a baby in a dumpster? A baby in ten dumpsters.

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How do Chinese people name their kids? They could look up a baby-names book, consult their family history, or make one up

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I walk into Tesco and wrestle an obese women for a packet of ''Mini's Biscuits''. This quarrel was over nothing but a trolley filled with them. I gradually became infuriated. Meanwhile, an employee commited suicide.

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Knock knock whose there alzheimers alzheimers who get in the van

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What's louder than a cat stuck in a tree? A foghorn.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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