Tommy was excited to get a tattoo of a falafel on his wiener. He got skin cancer.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Your best friend. No it's not, you stupid repo man...I'M NOT OPENING THE DOOR.

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Doctor! I have no problems at all! So, uh why are you here? Isnt that freaking weird? Wow, that might be a problem! Puh! I have a problem then. Yeah, goodbye!

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Spongebob. "Hey Patrick, I thought of something funnier than 24." Patrick "Let me hear it." Spongebob "25"

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A priest enters a bar moments after a young teen walks into the same bar. The priest scolds the teen, warning him of the possibility of arrest, alcoholism, and other bad life consquences. The teen apologizes to the bartender, and much later in life, he thanks the priest.

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Why did the rapper carry an umbrella? Because it was raining.

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I typed in in a Anti-joke and realized it was kind of hard.

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A: What dose God listen to? B: Slayer. A: Trick Question, God=Slayer

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How do you get a tissue to dance. You don't.

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Why did Johnathan drop his popsicle? He was hit by a bus. Knock knock? Who's there? Not Johnathan

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A drunk walks out of a bar gets in his car and proceeds to drive home the driver passed out at the wheel swerved in the wrong lane and smashed the car of the Jefferson family a young family of 4, the Jefferson family's car exploded into flames while the drunk sat back laughed and rubbed the wound on his head

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Q. want to hear the biggest lie in the world ? A. sure A.I have read and agree to the Terms of Service - View Terms of Service

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Whats the difference between a black an white guy? They have different skin tones

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Knock Knock Who's there? Your a slut

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i woke up in the middle of the night and my entire bed was wet... know what i did? i layed a towel down and went back to sleep

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Why did Bill correct Matt when he called him Jim? Because that wasn't his name.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. Some poems rhyme. This one doesn't.

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Why isn't Michael Jackson good at chess? Because he's dead.

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Why did the 60 y/o man take erectile dysfunction pills? His doctor prescribed them.

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Why does Santa Clause say Ho Ho Ho? He has Tuberculosis.

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Q. You guys want to here a joke? Kids: Yeah! A. Women's rights

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What did the cat say to the dog? Meow.

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What will your friend do after you kill him? Nothing, he is dead.

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Q: What would Martin Luther King Jr. be if he was white? A: Alive

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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