thats the same sound ur mom made in bed last night

Sir, do you know what time it is? Yes, it is 5:15 PM

Whats fleash color fleash color and fleashcolor? a naked hobo rolling down a hill

What do you get if you cross a bomb expert, and a homophobe a blow job

a man walks into a bar, when he leaves he thinks he can hold his liquor and kills a mother and two children attempting to drive home.

Q:Whats the difference between an Irish wedding and an Irish funeral? A:One less drunk

BRANDON LUI ROCKSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

So a little girl walked into a bar... A concerned adult then told the bartender. The bartender's name was Jim. Jim then asked the girl if she knew her phone number. The little girl said nothing and the bar tender was perplexed at the petrified look on the girls face. Jim the bartender then called the police and explained the situation.Once the girl was brought back to the police station it was learned that she had been missing for three months in a nearby county. The police then return to the bar to find that the owner had multiple kidnapped little girls in a cage under the bar that only he and the kidnapped girls knew about before the cops and Jim the bartender discovered it. The police then arrested The owner of the bar. He stood trial and was senteced to death row, he remains there today.

Whats Barack Obama's favorite number ? 7

Why did the guy fall asleep? Because he's in a coma.

Yo mama is so stupid... She didn't graduate high school.

Me - "Wanna hear something that will make me laugh?" *giggles* friend - "Sure." teehee if anyone gets it.

His Royal Highness was hunting in the forest accompanied by his squires and hunting dogs. A man, screaming, ran wildly out of the brush and addressed the hunting party. He said, "DON'T SHOOT! I AM NOT A MOOSE!! PLEASE DO NOT SHOOT!!!!" The king calmly raised his rifle to his eye and fired, hitting the man in the temple, and instantly killing him. A squire frantically turned to the king and said "Sire! Why did you kill this man?! He CLEARLY said he was not a moose!" The King replied "Oh! I thought he said he WAS a moose..."

Patient: Doctor, doctor! I feel like a pair of curtains! Doctor: That's because you are. Patient: Wow, I need to lay off the mushrooms.

What did the dead woman say to the murderer nothing dead people cant talk

Have you heats about the Guy who's parents died in à car crash... No He killen himself because of hus parents Deathstars

How Many Women Does It Take To Parallel Park A Car ? Zero , The Husband Drove

24

What's worse than getting no up-votes on an anti-joke? Getting down votes

Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

Knock,knock Who's there? Apple Apple who? Knock,knock Who's there? Apple Apple who? Knock, knock Who's there? Lemon Lemon who? Lemon know if you want me to say apple again

Wow, that is one of the things I would think I would react all bad to, but that`s, a strangely attractive quality in you.

Hitler has a certain "genocide-quaw" about him

Why couldn'nt Sally swing on the swing? Because Sally was a carrot

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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