Have you heard of the dog that sounds like Megan fox? No Oh, well ummm apperantally there's this ummm dog that sounds like Megan fox. So ummm yeah. Pretty interesting stuff

why did the car go to the bathroom? it had gas.

Why did the little girl pull her hair out? She didn't, It's a side-effect of the chemotherapy.

why did the chicken eat his brother? he was a canivore

Remember how I made you hypnotically cum by poking your own nose last time? When I told you that hypnotic story about the astrologer and the brain surgeon? So you wet yet? Think about how easy its going to be for me when I take out Mr.Big and slap down your coffee table with it, yeah... Feels cozy down there does it not?

How do you earn a bunch of money all at once? Walk into Hot Topic and say "I have knives for sale!"

Steven Hawking walks into a bar. Steven Hawking is disabled from the neck down. I lied.

y was man afaid of fire?, cuz its hot

Two muffins are in an oven. After a set period of time, they finish baking and are enjoyed by the family who had made them. Two weeks later the eldest daughter contracts syphilis thanks to numerous sexual partners. She soon dies leaving her parents and brother depressed. Her brother is kidnapped by a viscous child predator and the mother commits suicide. The father gets a job with the New York Yankees. He is eaten by a genetically modified zebra.

drugs sex and alchohole are yumme as AIDS

Q: Have you ever seen Ray Charles wife? A: Nethier has he.

A duck walks into a bar and says to the bartender "Put it on my bill."

Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

Why did the chicken cross the road?

Okay, hundred billions, and because I am fucking hungry, we make it perpetual, now the longer you keep the feeling going, the stronger and stronger and you know, trillions, indefillions, nondecillions, hell, make up your own numbers and just consider them higher. Bet its starting to feel pretty nice huh?

Why did the girl drop out of school? She was being sexually assaulted by her mothers alcoholic boyfriend and was having trouble coping.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Yes.

Two blondes were in a parking lot trying to unlock the door of their car with a coat hanger. They had left the keys inside and no-one was around to help.

What do you call a blackjack man driving a car? An average citizen.

Boy: Are you from Tennessee? Because you're accent sure sounds like it.

Knock Knock Who's there? Mormens...

Whats the difference between a monkey and a baby? Eating a baby tastes better with saltines.

Women outside of the kitchen.

What did the penguin say to the other penguin? Nothing, penguins don't talk.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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