How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Pokerface.

What's the difference between a sewer pipe and a French fry? A lot

What's worse than the Holocaust? A worm in your apple.

How do you stop a bus? You don't, and Regina George didn't either.

What did the mother say to her son? Nothing, she was dead.

Two muffins were in an oven. The first muffin says: 'It sure is hot in here!' The second muffin says: 'Why are they only cooking two muffins?'

Q. Why do cheetahs run so fast? A. Because their bodies allow them to.

what just happened when chuck norris falling from the sky..? Starts making a wish

When is the best time to wear a striped sweater? All the time.

BAr intO a wAlks… sorry I wrote that joke after walking out of a bar.

What do you do if an elephant comes through your window? Pay For a new window

Q: What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming over the hill? A: "Here come the elephants over the hill!"

During a boxing match, a white man faces an Asian. The Asian loses. Next the white man faces a Mexican. The Mexican also loses. Now the white man faces a black man. "Aw screw it!"

Laughter is the best medicine. No, Heroin is.

Humans and dolphins are the only species who have sex also for enjoyment.

Hey are you from tennessee? Because I recognize your accent and I grew up there also.

read this sentence again.

Person A: I think your father might be a thief, I'm not sure though. Person B: How come? person A: I cannot find my virginity. Person B: I apologize my dad taught me well.

God Nero, Marry me now! I removed the nose thingie but it wont stop.

If you go to America, you won't see any fat black people. They're all dead and in prison.

Whats black and white and red all over? Genital Warts...

What did the little boy with no arms or legs get for Christmas?? Nobody knows because he had no arms, therefore he could not open any presents.

My math homework brings all the asians to the yard and their like it wasent that hard and their like it wasent that hard. comment what song it is like.

A Christian and an atheist are in a bar. Neither one knows the other's religion and they continue to drink.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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