Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

What's big white and can't fly? -Half of America Whats big brown and can't fly? -Crap

Knock, knock Who's there? Doctor Doctor who?

How do you drown a blond? You hold her underwater.

What do you call your mother's bipolar brother with three arms? Uncle.

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a human being belonging to a particular religious minority and the other is a delicious Italian food favoured by English speaking western cultures. The problem with this anti-joke is that the facts are not correct, pizza was originally invented and China; however,it looked quite different then what might be considered pizza by our standards, when pizza was brought to Italy it was improved to make what we now consider pizza in modern times. While some people may consider pizza an Italian food, this would be failing to give credit to the Chinese who invented it.

America needs to burn Less fossil fuels to save the environment

Why did the duly oppressed individual where sunglasses? Because the sun was bright.

Why the babie was not drinking his milk? He was dead.

What's funny about 3 black men in a car going off a cliff? Nothing. They were my friends.

Why did the aisian man get pulled over? Because he was going over the speed limit .

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey.

there once was a man, he was old, and he had one wish...do you wanna know that wish? Well i don't know it because he died two seconds ago from a heart attack. Oh Well...

Why are rich people usually fat? They're living large

roses are gray, violets are grayer, f*ck this poem and listen to the slayer.

Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

Roses are red,Violets are blue, Who the hell are you,Get the hell away

Why couldn't Jack join the football team? Jack has down syndrome

I can prove I'm a psychic - this post is going to receive a lot of dislikes.

What's funnier than a dead baby? A dead baby in a clown suit.

eh dylan quieres que te trolle de nuevo

What do you call 10 dead babies in a blender? A horrible, horrible child abuse incident.

What's worse than a burglar breaking into your house in the middle of the night? A rapist breaking into your house in the middle of the night.

Q: what did the man with no eyes get for Chrismas? A: Reading glasses

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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