Why did Suzy fall off the swing? As Suzy neared the ground while swinging, her foot caught a small hole in the swingset's pebble foundation, and the power of Suzy's momentum along with the sudden stop of Suzy's swing forced Suzy to fly forward off of the swing. Suzy, seeing the silliness of her mistake, laughed it off, and tried to get back up. She quickly realized that her leg had snapped in half. Suzy will never walk again.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Jack just got his new yellow bicycle. His dad got it for his 12th anniversary. Jack was ecstatic to ride it down his street for the first time. He immediately called his friends Paul and Erick and went for his first ride. The neighbors were in AWE when they saw Jack taking off on his new ride. That day the three friends had one of the best day of their young lives, they went up to the lake, had some peanut ice cream and made fun of Alexia. Jack was in love with his new bike and euphoric that they were reunited and did all their favorite things with an incredible amount of passion. Erick hated his new bike.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

A group of 8 paintbal professionals land on an island to battle another paintball team. The team is then faced by a challeng of the other team ambushing them. Everyone is okay and not touched. A case breaks the window of the bus they hide in. They open the case and find a bullet proof vest. A man placed the vest on himself. They made it one by one out of the bus and to the otherside of the field the man with the vest was shot and started going... eghegeheghdjrhherbehgh and they pulled out a real gun bulet. They were now under attack by an enemy with real amunation. Then next man to run across the fied was killed. Tehy ran fr their lives.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What do you call a women with 2 black eyes? Hopefully nothing because abuse is something that shouldn't be messed with and it is wrong.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why was the Japanese man unable to see? Because it was extremely sunny outside and he had forgotten to wear sunglasses.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Q: What do you call a gay man in a... A: Keith.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

How do you get four gay men on one stool? You get three more stools.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

A Blond and a Brunette are falling down to their deaths, which one hits the ground first? Does it matter? They both die anyway.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Nero I know I am being a selffish bastard, but please let me speak with you for ten more minutes or so, I am sorry but its like part of me do not believe its you, we all saw your corpse, attended your funeral, please stick with me, I just feel flustered vulnerable and stupid.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Three black men walk into a gas station and don't steal anything.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Roses are red Violets are blue The sky is also blue

thumb_up thumb_down +17

"Knock knock?" "Who's there?" "Two dead kittens."

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Knock Knock! Who's there? Delivery for a Mr. Peerson? Oh yes, that's me. Thank you.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What's the diffrents between a horse and a zebra? WELL clearly there names duh.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Potassium? K.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

I heard you like getting dirty, so I got a dump truck to dump dirt on your bed so you can get dirty while you get dirty.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Welcome to Horsehead! 1. Our servers are derpy right now, do yourself a favor and never come back, oh yes they are gonna be derpy right then too! 2. THIS IS MY WORLD PEOPLE MYYYYY WOOOOOOOORLD!... ...Ps: My world sucks. 3. Antijokes 30000 per day, other stuff, Zero. (30000 by me) 4. You: People better like me because I dont like myself. Me: I like myself FUCK PEOPLE! FUCK YOU! (thats me on horsehead) welcome to die! 5. IRIS... IRIS! WHAT AM I TYPING FOOOOOOOOOOOOR!

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What's sweet and tastes like candy? Candy, now get in the van.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Whats funnier than a pile of dead babies nothing child abuse is not a funny matter.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

a man walks into a bar, it hurt.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why did Johnny fall of the Swing?? Because i hit him with a shovel

thumb_up thumb_down +15

what do you call a cow on a rollercoaster? a very dangerous and unlikely event

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why did the girl fall off the swing? she had no arms. Why doesnt she have arms? they got bit off by a shark. Knock knock. Who's there? Not the girl.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

How did the chicken cross the road?he just got up and walked to the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops