Knock knock, who's there? Your mom! Oh I'm comming.

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What does a hooker eat for breakfast, lunch, and dinner? Food.

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What can kill you when it falls out of a tree? Anything of a considerable weight actually.

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A: Ask me if I'm a tree! B: Are you a tree? A: No.

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Why did the man run away from the cat? He was allergic

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Why did billy fall off his bike? Because billy was a loaf of bread.

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6 in every 9 people find a dirty reference in every joke. This statistic is in fact false, as 5 in 9 people actually find a dirty reference.

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black people

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Words with two W's or N's in them are awkward and unnecessary.

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What happens when you get hit in the face? You get hurt.

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why did sally fall of the swing? because she had no arms... knock knock? (whos there) not sally

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A man takes a bite into a tuna casserole and burns his tounge. He is also a hermaphradite.

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You can pick your ur nose u can pick ur friends u just can't pick ur friends nose.

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What would you do if I jumped down your throat when you were talking? That would never happen, as it's impossible to even climb into somebody's mouth.

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Have you heard about the hipster paleontologist? He liked dinosaurs better when they were underground.

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How do you make a boy cry? Pour soup on his head.

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Why did h little boy drop his ice cream? Jerry Sandusky was behind him.

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Why do i love this website? Because it is funny.

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Q: Whats the difference between me and a ghost? A: Ghosts arnt dolphins!

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs on the doorstep? The Diabetes man

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Roses are red Violets are blue Why do the following sentences never have anything to do with the roses and violets?

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What's black white and red all over A Nun after being pushed down the stairs

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About numbers, it was 180 mg of valium... And I am going to live becausepeople got there in time, my heart never stopped because luck, the doc was only making a joke about me "having ingested enough valium to die at least twice". Sanders, I just got your girlfriend to agree to a threesome, if my banana ever wakes up again, AND WHEN... Thou areth forgiven, btw I sent him a picture of Line`s unshaved vagina, and a note stating: U recognize this? Find out more on horsehead network! Meh His name is Anders something Chattington, yeah for all that know him, guess whose finger is on her unshaven... Yeah, maybe you should not have messed with a guy that can have ANYONE. Ps: Then its your mother, then your sister which is 17 (and pretty 16 is legal here so fuck you Chatty!) and then I SHALL STRIKE THY WITH THE VENGEANCE OF A THOUSAND SUNS! Because you are forgiven, which I cant even remember what means, I mean I know I am typing my experiences here, but thats only because I remember by muscle memory where the buttons are, said the doctor... I can still play Snes emulators... Not, because my numb fingers cant click anything and Line is gone. I TOUCHED HER ALREADY YA KNO! YOU SAW THE PIC, My skin is tan, and... well you know she is here... The best part? She is totally okay with you knowing, sayonara pal, id watch the "fluor" in your mothers pussy the next time you eat it!

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Knock Knock there's a doorbell

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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