What do you call a bunch of spics playing soccer? Professional soccer players.

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Why did the guy stay up all night on the internet? because hes a fat ugly bastard with no life

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What did the cow say to the dog? Moo

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What happens when a toad is struck by lightning? The same thing that happens to everything else.

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so there was a frog a bear and a walrus... i forgot how the rest goes but they all die because of a nuclear holocaust

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Q: How do you turn a purple panda into a red panda A: Feed it grey poop and because it tasted so bad it got so mad it turned red.

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What did one jobless cancer cell say to the other? Lets go get Jobs.

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What do you get when you cross a shark and a squid Nothing thats impossible

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What did Emmanuel Frimpong say to George Elokobi? you sir, are DENCH

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A black man, an asian man, and white man walk into a bar. Not that out of the ordinary since America is a melting pot.

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Dear Anti Jokes> A black guy walks into a bar...He says hey u Idiot Gimme that Root Beer.. Tony Fast says IDIOT U GET OUTA HERE RIGHT NOW!Black women gets a gun and shoots his son... Tony Fast says im callin the cops on u then they kill alll. And they got hit by a bus. By TobyTurner

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Girl, why are you crying? I'm not a girl, I'm a strawberry.

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What is worse than 10 babys in 1 garbage can? 1 baby in 10 garbage cans.

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What did the the water hose say to the man? Nothing, but the sight of water made the man thirsty and he drank to excess and died from dilution of his blood.

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Simon says why the hell are we playing Simon say!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge asked "Mum, why is my name Fridge?" to which she replied "Because you deserve to be in one."

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1 111111 1 1 11111111111 1 1 111111 1

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What's better than getting second place in the paralympics? Having legs.

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In Soviet Russia, man doesn't walk to the bar. The bar walks to the man!

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Q: Why did Captain Kirk suck his own dick? A: Nobody else was around, I guess.

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Dad: Blind side was the black kid who played tight end. Me: Offensive line. Dad: Sorry, African American kid.

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Your mom is so stupid, she didn't know the answer to 2+5

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What did Sherlock Holmes say when he saw a very pretty lady? Hello

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Q: What do you call a white man with 5 black men? A: A friendly white man. Q: What do you call a white man with a hundred black man? A: A tourist in Kenya.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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