Why did whitney Houston become a drug addict? Because she made some very bad decisions in her life.

So a guy with alsimers walks into a bar........I forget the rest.

Kanye West walks into a bar. As he is a very popular celebrity, he is recognized instantly. The patrons mob him, asking for pictures and autographs. He is in a pleasant humour that evening, so he indulges them. Some laughs are had, he buys lots of drinks, and takes home two beautiful women. Such is the life of a celebrity. ...but that still doesn't make him happy.

knock knock Goodbye

Waitress: Would you like to have a drink? Customer: (Looks at the drink's menu) Hmmmm... What are my choices? Waitress: Yes and no.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.

A Muslim walks into a public library. 32 people killed in the explosion.

How do you make an elephant float? Who cares?

Yo mama so fat when she goes to the gym, she makes her trainer skinnier.

What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter because he won't come anyways.

what did i get my mom for her birthday? Nothing im selfish

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, This one doesn't.

Why did the chicken cross the road I don't know

what is the worst thing to find out about for wife she is your arm

An elephant walks into a bar. Several people are trampled.

What did batman say to robin before they got into the batmobile? Get in the batmobile.

Hickory Dickory Dock Three mice ran up a clock The cluck struck one But the two other got away with minor injuries

In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

How do you make a 5 year old cry? Kill their parents.

Q: What's small, round, and looks like a marble? A: A marble.

What happened when the boy stood up? He had all his limbs hacked off and soon after died.

How do you stop birds from building nests in your grill? You turn the grill on

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put my cøck in your mouth. Submitted by Arsha K.

How do two blondes stay alive at the bottom of a pool for 30 minutes? They don't and they died

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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