Two scientists are experimenting with sulfuric acid. One scientist says to the other, "Did you see the new intern?" In the process of turning to face the first scientist, the second scientist knocks the beaker over and spills sulfuric acid all over the first scientist's hand. The first scientist writhes in pain as the second scientist rushes to find a strong base to neutralize the burn. After a few minutes, the first scientist is rushed off to the emergency room and suffers from some serious chemical burns.

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Q. Why did the chicken cross the road A. Because he needed to get to the other side

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a chicken crosses the street to ask a man: what is an anti-joke? the man replies: a joke the chicken responds: so why do they call it an ANTI-joke? the man answers: why did the horse walk into a bar? the chicken retorts: you can't answer a question with a question! the man replies: you're a figment of my imagination, nah nah nah nah i can't hear you.

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yo mama's so fat, yo mama's so ugly; your mothers breasts sag with such severity that the late great surrealist artist Salvador Dali mistook them for clocks

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My friend on xbox told me about this cool clan. I went to join but I didn't like to wear the white robes

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Why doed Dorris suffer from incontinence? A weiner dog punctured her bladder.

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Roses are red, Violets are red, OH SHIT MY GARDENS ON FIRE

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Why is it stupid to call your son Bethany? It is commonly a girl's name.

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knock knock who's there Bob I don't know you Bob and if you don't get off my porch this minute i'm calling the authorities.

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i woke up in the middle of the night and my entire bed was wet... know what i did? i layed a towel down and went back to sleep

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Why did the blond check your phone? AIDS

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Why did Anna fall off her bike? She had no arms. Knock, Knock. Who's there? Not Anna.

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What sits on a shelf and says hey im a book? A person who thinks hes a book.

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Wanna hear a joke? Zeke friends Wanna hear a better jokes? Zeke with his friends

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A paralyzed person walks into a bar.

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Q: What's the difference between a trampoline and a bag of dead babies? A: I take off my shoes when I jump on a trampoline.

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What's the difference between a leopard and a coffee table? There is no difference. They both have four legs.

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Want to hear a joke? No.

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why did kim kardashian get divorced? because she was unhappy with her marrige. and because shes a slut

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Why are there no Jews in hell? Because Hitler is there,

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All of these jokes are about white people

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a man walked into a bar and ordered a beer. The Bartender says okay, here you go.

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Ask me if I'm a car. Are you a car¿ Yes¡

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Why did the boy jump of the cliff? He was following the others

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops