one day a hippy and a nun wer on a bus, the hippy asks, Will you have sex with me? the none replies, heck no im a nun. the nun gets off the bus and the hippy follows. the bus driver stops him and says, i know how you can have sex with her, she goes to the cemitary at 9:00 every night, dress us as jesus and command her to have sex with you. okay thanks! the hippy says. that night the hippy dress's up as jesus finds the nun and says " i am jesus and i command you to have sex with me. The nun says okay but only anal because im a nun! and they get to it, when there done the hippy takes off his mask and says haha im the hippy, the nun takes off her mask and says haha im the bus driver!! like if you get it :)

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A horse trots into a bar. He is left with a bump on his head.

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How do you confuse and anger a blonde? Kill her family and loved ones and say you did it because potato.

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A man walks into a bar. Suddenly, he is filled with a strange feeling, as if his life is somehow the subject of a stupid joke. He walks back out of the bar and consults a psychiatrist.

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Your momma is so fat, she has her own gravitational pull.

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Yo mamma is so ugly, but your father was willing to look past that. They fell in love and you were born about a year after they got married.

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In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

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What did the man with cancer get for his birthday? A gravestone.

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What do you call justin bieber haveing sex with a lady? A dream

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ur an fagit

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What is black and blue and doesn't like sex? The 6 year old in my basement.

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How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They sent her to her room without dinner.

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A princess kisses a frog to aquire a prince.. then gets arrested for beastiality.

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What did the hose say to the sprinkler? I'm gonna squirt you.

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Obama Getting Re-Elected.

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An englishman, an irishman amd a scotsman were walking down the street. What a fine example of unionism

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If you're happy and you know it get a life

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What do you get when you cross a taco with a a bungee cord? An inedible taco.

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Policeman: Knock, knock. Woman: Who's there? Policeman: The police. I'm afraid there's been an accident. Your husband has been killed.

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a white man a black man and an asian man had a few drinks at a bar. they all died from alcohol poisoning

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How many Polacks does it take to change a lightbulb? Two, one to change the lightbulb, one to hold the ladder.

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Why did Suzie die? She ate too many fried twinkies.

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Why didn't my marriage work out? Because I married a tangerine.

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Whats worse than being raped? Being raped twice.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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