Ever heard of carpel tunnel? Well after that girl it was more like carpal toungal

Me: "If I had Alzheimers, I would break down into tears." Friend: "Why, you would forget why you were crying..." Me: "Who are you again?"

69

Wanna hear a joke? Me too.

Why was the boy sad? He was harassed by his mum who died in the 1800's and went into a depressive state in which he drove himself to death using a pair of pliers and a rechargeable battery. No, he really just stubbed his toe.

Jon walked into a bar. Ouch.

Why couldn't the white guy tell the two asians apart? They were identical twins.

How do you stop a black man from drowning? Take away his glass of water.

What kind of movies do pirates like? They don't know, Somalia doesn't have much of a film industry.

Roses are red Violets are blue i have aides egg

why didn't the donkey go to the party? Because, unfortunately he did not have the required linguistic skills to communicate with the person inviting. This is obviously dependent on whether the person who invited him was a human, if it was another donkey then perhaps this would of happened. However, this is also very unlikely as donkeys do not have parties or really communicate

A man walks up to you and asks you:"What's funnier than a dead baby?" and then smiles, you then proceed to frown and tell him he needs to seek help. The next day you see his face on your TV

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 commited statutory rape on a younger 5, gang banged 8 with 10 and 11, murdered 9, and was sentenced to jail for life.... eventually the case was dropped and 7 was let out early for community service. He told 6 he was coming for him 6 months later.... 6 was so terrified he didn't know what to do... he was living in fear... eventually he commited suicide by jumping off a cliff just off the coast of Palm Beach into the pacific ocean. His body was never found His family didnt get to say good bye... This is why 6 was afraid of 7

My brother gave my mom AIDS. My mom gave my dad AIDS. My dad gave my dog AIDS. My dog gave me AIDS. I gave my sister AIDS. My sister called the police because of the wild case of AIDS.

Your Mom was so fat he made herself Liposuction Twice

What did the electron do after losing his proton? Trough electromagnetical forces, the electron simply left it's atom, making it become a positive ion. Then, atracted by other atom's magnetical force, it joins the other atom's last vallence shell, creating a negative ion, since there are more electrons then protons in the atom in issue.

What is black, white and red all over? Something that pertains those characteristics

If Bob has 65 sweets and he eats 57 how many does he have? Bob has diabetes. He has high blood sugar, either because the body does not produce enough insulin, or because cells do not respond to the insulin that is produced.

Why was the black man crying? His wife left him, took his children, and most of his possessions in the divorce.

Why cant Helen Keller drive a bus? Cuz she's dead!

Why did little Sally fall off the swing? Because Sally has no arms. Knock knock! Who's there? Not Sally.

A dog with toothpaste in it's mouth wanders into a bar. The bartender beats it to death, because he thought it had rabies.

some dude: weed is bad Other dude: then why do they prescribe it to people are you dumb or are you stupid

Roses are red, Wait. Why start this poem when you cant finish it Refrigerator

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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