a jewish duck trips over a series of metal corckswcrews and proceeds to die of ADHD the answer is 4

My girlfriend wanted to talk about her feelings ... SO I TOLD THAT BITCH THAT... i really loved her and care about her feelings

Don't quote me on this Nero, but she kinda deserves it, she should know better, its not like you have gotten this far by not knowing your limits, even if you tend to break them way too often. Can you get rid of the hallucinations with your mind alone? If not get to sleep asap! And stay asleep for a month or so, and if they somehow cant feed your system intravenously, they can all get the fuck out of there.

Whats worse than the holocaust? Nothing.

Your mum so ugly that she isn't married

why did the man french kiss the horse? because he was high on l.s.d and confused the horse for an attractive male because he himself was homosexual ps vagina monkeys and chili

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a worm in your penis.

Q1: How do you get an elephant to laugh? A1: Tell it a joke. Q2: How do you get a cow to laugh? A2: Cows can't laugh.

Why is it bad luck for a black cat to cross your path? I'll tell you in Heaven

Why couldn't the married couple have sex? They were lesbians who were saving up a sex change.

CAUSE IT'S ONE, TWO, THREE STRIKES YOU'RE OUT

Rose are red, I dont give a shit. When I think of you, I play with my clit. :)

Why did the little girl fall to death? Because pigs can't fly. It's impossible.

A convict is ripping out stop signs .. and a police comes out of no where and screams "What are you doing?!" The guys says Ripping up stop signs..

Why was the black kid at school? Because he wanted to receive an education.

So a crippled guy rolls into a bar..

A drunk guy walks into a car

Well that sucks, your dad is dead.

A kid asks his mom: "Mom, what would I be when I grow up?" And so his mother answers: "You won't grow up, you have cancer"

How do you starve a Mexican? You stick him in a secure room and deprive him of food resources

Why did the blonde woman decide to get plastic surgery? Because she was self-conscious and unhappy with the way she looked.

Why did the little girls ice cream melt? Because she was on fire.

Its a sunny day. There's a tree and a bird. What did they say to each other? --------------------------------------------------- Nothing they can't talk.

Why did you not just "put a spell" on her instead? And you are totally mean, ever actually killed someone?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...