what do you call a white man who appears to be standing on water? a surfer

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Mary had a little lamb, The nurse and midwife fainted. Because last year she met a ram, And they got too acquainted.

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whats funnier than 24? 25

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A poor boy receives his first wrapped present in his entire life. Why did he hate it so much? Because it was a copy of "Mien Kampf" Is he Jewish? No, he actually does know what "Mien Kampf" is because he is poor and cannot read.

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What do you get for the man that has everything already? Another one.

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What's the simularity between a eagle and a rock? They both fly, exept for the rock.

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Q. Why did the chicken cross the road? A. To get to the other side.

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chuck norris and superman had a bet. Chuck norris immediatley won because superman is a fictional character played by an actor. Chuck norris then decided to have a bet with the actor that played superman and lost

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What is black and white and red all over? Black people in a blender. I lied about the white

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How do you know when a bag of chips is stale? It is past the expiration date.

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What do you call a Welshman with a stick up his arse? A very odd man

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hat did the fridge say to the oven your hot baby \

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Q. What's the difference between a duck? A. One of it's legs.

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Have you seen Ray Charles' new house? Neither has he...

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Why couldn't the teenager go to the pirate movie? He didn't have any money.

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(Mortal Kombat Annihilation) Princess Kitana: "Mother, you're alive" Sindel: "Too bad you, will die" (Troll 2) "They're eating her. And then they're gonna me. Oh my gawwwwwwwwd." (The Room) Johnny: I did not hit her, it's not true! It's bullshitt! I did not hit her! [throws water bottle] Johnny: I did *not*. Oh hi, Mark. Mark: Oh, hey Johnny, what's up?

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Q: Why is Little Johnny in the hospital with a bullet wound and a broken arm? A: I shot him of his bike.

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What did the black guy say to the Jewish guy when it began to rain? It's raining.

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Two Jews are sitting in a large oven. They realize it is a dangerous place to be and get out of the oven.

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You: Want to hear a joke? Person: Yeah You: Me too

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a tomato.

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How many dead babies can you fit in a bath tub? One second let me count them.

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Why did the monkey cross the road? Because he saw the chicken do it.

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What's grey and can't fly? A parking lot.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops