You can lead a fool to wisdom, but you can't make him think.

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Your mother is so fat that when she jumps into a pool, she displaces a proportionately larger amount of water than people with normal body mass indexes or BMI

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Stephen Hawking walks into a bar.

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why cant the porcupine marry the balloon? ...neither one can talk.. obviously.

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Why did Jimmy fall off the swing? He had no arms. Knock-knock Who's there? Not Jimmy

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How many pancakes can you fit into a gopher hole? Red - because ice cream doesn't have any bones.

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if you don't like this you're gay

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What gets louder as it gets smaller? A baby in a trash compactor.

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A man walked into a doctors and said, “Doctor help! My arms have stopped working” to which the receptionist replied, “I’m not the doctor and you need to make an appointment.”

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Chose to describe yourself: Green thumb: Tall wealthy, good looking, intelligent man with a model wife, a ferrari expensivo, a hotel just for yourself. Red thumb: A below average piece of shit? Green thumb? Dont lie to me you piece of sh*t!

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Q. why did the black man cross the road? A. Cause there is no law saying he cant

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What do you call 5 black people being killed in a car crash? A terrible incident

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A kid walks into a ctholic school and asks about the therory of evolution.

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roses are red violets are blue this verse doesn't ryhme and neither does this one

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Q: Whats the difference between a Jewish man and a pizza? A: Jew's are humans and can feel emotions, as for pizza's can not feel emotions, because they are pizzas.

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How do two blondes stay alive at the bottom of a pool for 30 minutes? They don't and they died

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The new Minons film reminds me of most foreign films.. You can't undertand a fucking word they say and they're all yellow

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Listen, it's a free country.

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What would you do if I ripped your face off? Bleed to death.

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Why did the little girl fall from the swing? She's got no arms.

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why did the drug dealer die... because he got terminal cancer and died during the first 3 weeks

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Q: What did the Goth-Punk girl write on her test for the question "What are three kinds of rock?" A: Igneous, Sedimentary, & Metamorphic, She is a 4.0 Geology Major attending a respectable University. She simply chooses to express herself through the musical and clothing trends that emerged in 1970's English underground music. In reality it her personal preferences in the aforementioned areas have no bearing on her intellectual or academic standing.

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What does an orange and a lemon have in common? They are both orange, exept lemon

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Why does Magic Johnson have to use extra-large condoms? Because he's got a giant dick and HIV.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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