If the 49ers won the superbowl

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roses are red viloites are sour open your legs and give me an hour

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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Cripples are lame.

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Q: What happens when two feminists try to chanbe a lightbulb? A: That's not funny.

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That awkward moment where all you want for Christmas is for your parents to get back together but then you realize that they died in a car crash

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Where do penguins keep their money? No where. Penguins don't have a money economy

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Dwight Howard

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Send creepy emails to this email address: matt.harrington@highlandcatholic.org

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#If you go down in the woods today, your sure of a big surprise #If you go down in the woods today, you better go in disguise. # I don't know why, I started typing this out and realized I couldn't actually come up with a suitable concluding line.

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? (Because she was blind and deaf?) No, because she was a woman.

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What does a blond do when she stops at a red light? She gets arrested.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Why did she fall again? Because somebody put her back on. Why wasn't she able to hug her dad? Because she has no dad.

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Q. What do you call a retarted guy? A. Whatever his name happens to be

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What's big, black, and just knocked an 8 year old girl off of her bike? The refrigerator I just threw at her. (not all are white you know)

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Whats the diffetance between a river and a waterfall? One is vertical!??

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whats the difrence between a japaneese and chineese person? one is from japan and one is from china.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.

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Q: Whats A Schoolbus Full Of Black Children??? A: A Rotten Banana!!!

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A witch walks into a bar and orders a drink. She gets her drink and proceeds to have a great time.

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What's the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a pile of dead babies in my garage.

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Why was the mohel touching the little boy's penis? Because that's his job!

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So a plane flies into a world trade centre... That's not funny

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Why are you on this sight? You're procrastinating. I am too

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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