What do you call nuts on a wall? Walnuts. What do you call nuts on your chest? Chestnuts. What do you call nuts on your chin My dick in your mouth.

What's worse than getting shot? Getting shot twice.

What did jimmy get for dinner? Food

Q. Why did Michael Jackson call Boys II Men? A. He thought it was a home delivery service.

how do you get a cat out of a tree? shoot it

Why did the chicken go to KFC? Because it was suicidal.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was attached to a bomb filled with spoons

What did the woman say to the dog? Stop shitting on my carpet your dickhole

roses are red violets are blue i have to poop

Why did the cookie go to the doctor, beause he was feeling really crumby...becuase he has testicular cancer

What's most weird about necrophilia? They copulate with dead bodies.

How many Mexicans does it take to screw in a light bulb? Just one. Any more than that and they would just be getting in each others way.

How do you make a snake blink? You can't

Roses are red Violets are blue You don't want to be my valintine I'm going to shoot myself.

Why did the man Jump of a bridge? Because he got sick of his life and he wanted to die.

Why couldn't the journal cross the street? Because there was a red light.

why was the tolit stoped up. because it had phoo

You know what they say about guys with big feet. They have big feet.

a man walks into the bar and say, OUCH!!

Hey Bill, did you know we have a black guy in our family tree? Really? Yeah, he's still hanging there

What did George Bush say when 9/11 happened? "Silly pilots! The airport isn't in a building!"

ur gey

How types of people are there? One, we are the only homo sapiens.

Why couldn't little Jimmy play catch with his dad? Because he was an orphan.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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