What do you call a chair in the middle of the road? A danger to drivers.

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Why did the little boy fall over. Because someone shot him in the face.

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Why did the blond cross the road? The police officer who arrested her for shoplifting parked his car on the other side of the street.

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Wow Nero, you never explained the process, its like I am at the ocean again, but dont lie, you still fear showers... Sorry its just not you when you lie to me, I know I should be more concerned about you, ill bring those old stuff, im tired, sleepy, I suppose thats your work huh Nero? Thanks, call it as a brother or what you want, but I really love you and wont ever stop doing so. Goodnight Nerochan, promise me you will take care of yourself, we all got a long life ahead of us, and I want to spend more time with you, if its fine for you and your wife.

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Your momma's so not fat that when a school bus rolled by here house, she just sat there and turned on oprah.

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Yo mama is so stupid that see should really be concerned with furthering her education in a four-year university

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Have u seen stevie wonders new house? No. Niether has he

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Who ate my sandwich? The office appliance that fell from the sky.

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An indian boy asked his Dad,'Why do we have such long names?' His father didn't reply, he died on the road home.

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Why the kid can't get off the water? Because your feet is on his head

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whos gay and sits next to me? Griffen in my architecture class

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What do you call a man with no arms and legs laying at your doorstep? Matt.

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Yo momma so fat, she was recently diagnosed with type 2 diabetes and is at great risk for developing heart disease!

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"CHOCOLATE!!!!!!!!" -Spongebob

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WHO'S YO DADDY? the man who's semen combined with your mother's egg to create a child.

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Why wouldn't they give Helen Keller a driver's liscense? Because she was a woman.

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John and Marry wanted an abortion. God just laughed And Jesus was born Merry Christmas everyone!

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Someone dies every second. That's 60 a minute. 3600 a hour. 86,400 a day. 604,800 a week. 31,536,000 a year. But thankfully- I don't live in Zimbabwe.

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Pete and repeat are in a boat. Pete kills him self due chronic depression. Repeat laughs his ass off

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what's the difference between your grandmother and a dead squirrel? Technically, if you burn them both, your grandmother will produce more ash, but apart from that, they are both useless pieces of carbon.

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Why didn't the door open? Because it was locked

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A: What did the Orange say to the Mango? B: Sup Hommie?! A: Wtf.... (awkwardly walks away)

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Your sex life.

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Carlos was on the computer writing anti-jokes. They all scuked.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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