What do you call a dog with no legs? What ever you want, its still not going to come.

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A Jew walking in the street sees a homeless person asking for charity. He reaches to his pocket, grabs a penny, greets her with a nice smile and gives away the penny.

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A woman walked into a bar. Many men laughed at this unthinkable notion because women belong in the kitchen.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, It's not my fault, I found you in a zoo!

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Q. Which is longer ... a rope ?

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why was the boy sad He was just abused by his parents and had aids

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What did the man say when he walked into a bar? Nothing because he got knocked out because he was running too fast and hit his head.

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why did sally drown? because she had no arms or legs and couldn't swim

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"Ask me if I'm a tree!" "Are you a tree?" "No."

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Men's rights Because its an anti-joke

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how do you get a clown off a swing. hit it with an apple in his nuts

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What do you call a lump on your penis? STD

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why wasnt nathan invited the party? nathan's been dead for 5 years

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What is blue and has wheels? A disabled Smurf!

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Is it not a antijoke? When your granpa uncle or whatever used to pull out basically worthless coins out of your ears? And each time you wanted for him to drag out so many you can actually buy some bubblegum or something, the "stash" you where saving diminishes the moment you receive a new coin? Moral: Dont believe in yourself! Believe in me! Because I believe in you!

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Yo Momma is so fat, she often chooses to take the elevator instead of the stairs.

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? He died! Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? He was attached to the first! Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? He thought it was a game! Why did the fridge fall out of the tree? The branch broke! Why did Sally fall off her bike? She got hit by three monkeys and a fridge!

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A man felt a pain in his stomach. He went to the doctor.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He never did because he's in KFC

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. Some poems rhyme, but this one doesn't.

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If Justin Bieber and Rebecca Black had a baby, would it be a boy or a girl? It's a fifty-fifty shot.

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Reality is often boring. TV is often bad for you. Reality TV is boring AND bad for you.

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i found the cure to cancer.......AIDS

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How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Bridget, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and since it is rather long, it brushes against her round breasts. Even though she is a little sweaty, you realize what a beautiful woman she is, and you decide not to kill here. You instead ask her to marry you, and after she replies "yes", with tears of joy streaming down her face, you two make passionate love in the front seat of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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