are you MC Donald's because I'm lovin' it!

I met a hot girl in the Tampon aisle and i asked if she wanted to hang out in 5-7 days

When life gives you lemons Unless it gives you sugar, water, and a cup your lemonade will suck

Why did the black man get arrested? He sold cocaine.

When a Jew with a boner walks into a wall what hits first? It really depends weather his arm or leg is sticking out when he hits the wall. When studying trejectory sciences, you will find out that it will be nearly a 95% chance that his foot will in fact hit the wall first.

Knock Knock whose there your parents your parents who your parents just got malled by a hobo with an axe.

Q: How many dwarfs does it take to change a light bulb? A: 1 or 2. One to change the light bulb and maybe another one to guards the staircase for the safety of the first one when the ceiling is too high (Wich happens almost every time because they are dwarfs.)

So a black guy goes to college and doesn't steal anything or rape anyone. He has a 4.0 GPA and is one of the smartest students at Harvard University.

roses are red, violets are are blue, I have five fingers, the middle one is for you

A Jewish man answered his phone one day. The man on the line said he'd kill him and all his family. The Jewish man then hung up the phone and resumed his everyday life.

What's worse than a worm in your apple? The Holocaust No, the Holocaust never even happened, you're an idiot.

What is white and flys at you from a tree? A refridgarator. I lied about the flying part.

Q. What do cows and grass have in common? A. They both moo, except for grass ????????????

Get a life besides thumbing down statements telling you advice.........

Why did the man complain of pain in his ankle? Because several consecutive tissue samples of the area revealed a rapidly metastasizing neoplasm. Blood samples indicated the presence of what appeared to be Hodgkins Lymphoma. He had multiple MRI's and bodily fluid tests to confirm the diagnosis. The man was very wealthy, however, and had world class doctors treat him. He then donated a vast portion of his wealth to research. 12% of the donated money went into studying the medicinal effects of Twinkies.

What's red and shiny? Not the holocaust

What's the difference between me and an animal? I'm human

Im not random you just can't think as fa-bunnies

Why didnt the chicken cross the road? He was chicken.

Knock knock. Who's there? The interrupting doctor. The inter-- --You have cancer.

Why did the black guy cross the road? He didn't because he forgot to precede crossing the busy street with caution; therefore he was critically injured and then placed in a hospital.

Can you get me a stapler,but make sure it has staples or else I won't be able to staple anything

Why did the young boy hit the other young boy? Because the other young boy was bullying his friend and he thought it was time he should stand up for himself and take control of the situation.

I insist, you go ahead. See you around. how about in four six hours?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...