Non-Anti-Joke.com!

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A boy walks into a bar. He wakes up in a hospital 3 days later with a bruise on his head. He asks the doctor, "What happened?" The doctor replies, "The bartender smashed a glass on your forehead."

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What’s worse than taking a bite out of your apple and finding a worm? Taking a bite out of your apple and finding half a worm.

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Why did the man eat the cat? I don't remember the punchline, but trust me it was hilarious.

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I remember the last words my grandpa said before he kicked the bucket. I bet I can kick this bucket. He missed and had a heart attack.

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Kittens are orange, puppies are grey, and they both make good pets

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Q: Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? A: Because she was a woman.

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In a stranded island, a plane crashes. Only one man survives. He asks himself "Where do I bury everybody else?" The others proceed to look at him strangely. He was the only surviving male.

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What the difference between a ferarri and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a pile of dead babies in my garage. That would be murder.

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What happens when a chemist dies? They are given a proper funeral and buried.

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An american, canadian, and mexican are on a skyscraper. Canadian: (pulls off maple leaf) we have to many of these in our country (throws off building) Mexican: (pulls out burrito) we have to many of these in our country (throws off building) American: (looks at mexican) we have to many of these in our country (pushes mexican off building)

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got ran over by a car.

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A man walks into a resteraunt and joins his friends. Then he realized he had no friends. ~YN~

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roses are red, violets are blue, i have alzheimers, cheese on toast.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I like funny jokes but I tend to ruin the punchline by just talking too much and that's probably why no one likes me and...

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What did the shy guy say at the speech? Nothing

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I like to give help to people, expecting that they will be my slaves for life.

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Why did the black man buy a watermelon? Because they're not free.

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Where do cows get cultured? They don't, they get slaughtered first.

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If boobs are round. And so are balls. Then i just cant figure out why the sky is blue?

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Going out for a quiet one, having a drink or two, and returning home.

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Why can't Stevie wonder read? He can. He reads braille.

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How do you make a little girl cry twice? You rub your bloody penis on her teddy bear.

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what did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? wheres my tractor

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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