What's the difference between a pessimist and a magnet? One is made of flesh and can talk, think and do things. The other is made of metal and can only pull things towards itself or push them away. But strangely, the latter is a lot more welcome in most situations.

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What are 3 skills black people have that they use for basketball? Great hand eye co-ordination, communication and encouragement.

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A man walks into a bar and says ouch.

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I gotta friend named Michael Nugyen and he dishonored his family. Did I mention he was asian ( he live in tampa fl )

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Why did I call 87 yr old Jamie McMeanBully a douche bag? Because he's sterile

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What's worst than your computer breaking? Your face

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On Friday the 13th,My cat turned into a dog.

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Stephen Hawkings may know everything about the universe, but try to get him to tie his shoes.

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why did the black child cry? strange men cut his penis off

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? He chickened out.

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so a huge calculator walks into a bar, and a man steps out from behind it, and wipes his forehead.

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What is the connection between a blonde and a halogen headlamp? There is none, one is a female human being with blonde hair and the other is a headlamp with a halogen lightbulb.

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Q: How many Marys does it take to drive you crazy? A: Just one ::stares at Mary Annoyingly::

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How many cops does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None, they just beat the night since its black

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A: knock knock A: knock knock knock... A: door bell

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How are friends and bananas alike? If you peel their skin and eat them they die.

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A man walks into a bar and sees another man crying at the other end he asked what's wrong the man replies well its a long story I have time replyed the other man ok well me and my wife are always arguing. So I divided to go to the library after hours of reading I see a book about history and as im reading it its time to go home and when I was going to check it out I forgot my library card I get home and me and my wife make up and have a baby thats not bad at all said the other man yea you've never lost ur library card

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what did Cinderella say when she got to the ball? "Grggglgluglguggarglegerrrllggglge"

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what good about eatting every night knowing that a african want

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Why do people waste there time writing Anti-Jokes Becuase they enjoy there right to the 1st ammendment and who are we to question it

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brock has small hands for a small job

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You know whats better than 24? 25

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Godilla walks into a bar. There were no survivors.

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hows your wife she died 7 years ago really mine too

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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