An Irish man sips at a large beer. Oh yeah and your mother's a whore.

why did they plain crash? cause of gravity stupid

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.. A: Knock Knock B: Who's there? A: Not Sally

Why did the chicken cross the road? It is not a sentient animal and is unaware of the dangers it will face.

Q. What's cold and has no feelings? A. A pole

how did the snake fly? it couldnt snakescant fly

This is an anti- joke

Q: what's your dog's name ? A: Dog.

What's harder than nailing a dead baby on a tree? My dick while doing it.

John's life hasn't been the same since committing suicide 13 years ago.

YOU: Whats the difference between a white guy and a black guy swimming in a pool? Nothing except one has melenan in their skin

what do you call a white and black girl 69? ying yang

There is a asian, mexican and a blonde boy at school. Every day they each get the same food for lunch. The asian always got noodles. The mexican a taco. the blonde boy got pb and j. They decide if they get this lunch again, they will jump off a cliff. The next day they get the same lunch and jump off a cliff. At their funeral the asian mom says " if i had known, i would have made her sushi." the mexican mom says " i would have made her a burrito." The blonde's dad say "hey don't look at me, he makes his own lunch."

what did one sandwich say to another sandwich? nothing, sandwiches cant talk

Q: How do you know when a woman is about to say something smart? You don't. You just shut up and listen.

What did the blind man say to his best friend? All i see is darkness and i want to end my life

Roses are red Violets are blue You think this will rhyme But it's not gonna

Why was Mr. Smith always so sad at the block party? His uncle molested him as a child, when he was 10 he finally told his mother. His mother and father later fought if they should tell the police, the mother wanted him to go to jail, and the dad didn't want to ruin his family because the uncle was his brother, and the uncle had children. Right before his mother would call the police his father stabbed her in the back, mr smith saw what happened. Him and his father hid his mothers body and mr smith"s dad told him if he tells anyone about this he will kill him. Years later when mr smith was 13 he went on drugs to ease the pain, he later became an addict, and dropped out of school. He know suffers from depression and has killed all 3 of his wives. He is wanted in many middle eastern countries. So when ever he goes to sleep he has the same dream were him mom offers him pot and right before he gets it his dad stabs her in the back. So know mr smith is sad at the block party because he will kill himself later tonight.

What haircut did Timmy get at the barbershop? He didn't, he saved money from the barber by going through chemo.

Why did the little girl drop her teddy bear? Because she was being sexually molested. Why did the little Jewish girl drop her teddy bear? Because gas came out of the shower-head.

In 1843 when Man invented the moon, people set sail on ironclad ships to lands that sold items that weren't for sale in similar such stores in other lands not reachable by ironclad ships or dirigibles as they became known once they changed form completely and were a differentobject entirely and of no use for water transport. That's when the real revolution in telecommunications began, the truck drivers would use CB radios as early as 1287 and 1276 in Canada. the CB radio enabled the users to order pizza and develop symbiotic relationshiops with canvas. Amongst other things.

(Knock, knock) A: Who's there? B: Orange A: That is impossible. Oranges are inanimate objects and, therefore, cannot speak.

How many blondes did it take to screw in the lightbulb? Just one. She did a fine job.

Why did the airplane crash? The pilot had a stroke.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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