Q: Why did the man cross the road? A: Cause he felt like it.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why can't you tell jokes in Base 8? Because 7, 10, 11

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What do you call a person driving a plane? Not a pilot, they fly planes.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Knock knock. Who's there? John. John who? John Smith.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

How do you kill a blond? Shoot her in the face.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

yo mamma's so retarded that shes a potato

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Adam Chebali is awesome

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why can't you hear a pterodactyl going to the bathroom? Because dinosaurs died out 65.5 million years ago.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What do you call a girl who denies that she is one? Justin Beiber

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What do you call a German who roasts Jews for a living? A comedian.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why was six afraid of seven? 7 is greater than 6. Didn't you learn about number lines in 3rd grade?

thumb_up thumb_down -12

How do you drown a blonde. I recommend that you do not drown a blonde because it is a felony. You could face 30-35 years in prison.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Q: Why couldn't the man lick his ice cream? A: Because his body shut down due to the fact that a bullet went straight through his brain. This happened before he could even order his ice cream.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What did Helen Keller name her dog? ruh-ruh-blah-blah-bluh

thumb_up thumb_down -12

How many people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One to drop it and die of gas poisoning.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

I found a lump on my right testicle. So, as a precaution I went to my local hospital to have myself checked out. Thankfully, it wasn't accute testicular cancer. Instead I only had to suffer for a few months, but it's getting better now. Sadly, I won't be able to have children and now my semen has a somewhat unsavoury flavour. Thanks for asking.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

E M I L Y L Y N C H B I L L I E J E A N L A R K I N YEOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

thumb_up thumb_down -12

A guy is taking a pee in the ocean and a fish swims up and drinks the pee. The fish says "thanks for the lemonade."

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What's worse than walking into your parents room while their have sex? Getting no-scoped by zzirgrizz

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why did the little girl pull her hair out? She didn't, It's a side-effect of the chemotherapy.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

When you try to go to anti-joke.com but get redirected to Horsehead Network...

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Half empty = half full Therefore Half (empty) = half (full) empty= full Half empty

thumb_up thumb_down -12

your mom is so nasty that when she took a shower and acquired general etiquette, she became possibly more respectable

thumb_up thumb_down -12

The Israeli asked the Japanese guy to open his eyes The Japanese guy said, I'm not squinting you crazy Jew. You're the one that sold me these cheap glasses.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops