- Anti Joke

Two scientists are working in a lab. The first one asks, "Do you want some sodium?" The second one pours acid into the first one's eyes.

Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a pail of water, Jack fell down and broke his crown and Jill came tumbling after. They both died of blood loss.

Phoebe: Joey, it's a birthday party. Joey: Yeah, but for a one year old. What's the point? The other day, she laughed for like an hour at a cup. Just a cup with a picture of Elmo on it dressed as a farmer. And he's standing next to this cow. And the cow says...."Elmoooo!" Joey: starts to laugh Yeah...that's a funny cup.

roses are red, violets are are blue, I have five fingers, the middle one is for you

What is worse than being killed in a car crash? Having your girlfriend in the car with you.

Did you hear about the two guys that stole a calender? They each got six months.

Man :A homo-sexual panda walks into a gay bar. Homo-sexual Panda : Wait...wait I'm gonna stop you right there. I will not take part in this odd joke, so just ummmmmm ya. And another thing, my species is extremely offended by your inferior remarks. Why can't homosexual panda just have piece?

Why did the little girl miss 7 straight days of school? She died.

Two girls were taken away mysteriously in the night. The next day, no one cared because they were orphans.

Joe: Hey, why are your counters all red and your blender looks broken? Me: The same reason why Mrs. Johnson's baby is missing. ajl

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

my friend got in a car wreck,he lost his left arm and left leg. how is he now? Hes all right.

i hate non minorities!

What is the difference between john madsen and a gay person. There isn't because john is gay

THAT AWKWARD MOMENT... nuff said

Jemal picks 3 apples. He eats two of them, and then picks 3 more. What color was Jamal?

What's big and white and wilbkill you if it falls from a tree? My dick.

Man I just flew in from Pittsburgh...Boy are the people ugly.

ohai. whutz en ahntei johk? sownz soopihd.

You know what's real bullshit? That stuff that comes out of a bull's ass.

Why did the Squirrel swim across the river upside down? To keep its nuts dry.

Why did the school fall? Because a hurricane hit.

What did God say to Abraham? Nothing, because God doesn't exist.

A black man, an arabic man, and a hispanic man are all in a car, who is driving? The black man.

Where is Jew University? Berlin, Germany