Q: Who lives in a pineapple under the sea. A: Tsunami victims.

What happens if you drop a baby of a cliff It dies

What did John say to Paul before they entered the car? "Paul, get in the car."

Why did Billy kill Joey? Joey had sex with Billy's wife... and Billy wanted revenge.

What did the boy reading a book do? He finished the book and took it back to library.

The only positive thing in my life, is the HIV test! Lymmel

Q: What did the black kid get for Chirstmas? A: Your bike

What does a person with Alzheimer's do? To get to the other side.

Knock knock. Who's there? Fire extinguisher. Fire extinguisher who? POMEGRANITES.

Justin Beiber walks into a bar. The bartender does not serve him because he is not the legal drinking age yet.

How do you make Lady Gaga cry? Attack her with a sanding machine.

why was sally the best at hid and go seek they couldn't find her body

What happened to my sunglasses?

Q: why was the baker a coward? A: his own mother told him his potential would amount to nothing more than a baker and when a dinosaur came into the bakery he ran away

So, I was walking down the street. As i walked past a oak door an entrance to a mental institution, I heard a bored voice going, "eleven, eleven, eleven". My curiosity, like a cat, got better of me and I decided to take a peek through the key hole and see the eleven things being counted. As soon as I had my eye on the key hole, I was poked in the eye by a metal rod. Startled, I feel back to the street. And, sure enough, heard the same bored voice, going, "twelve, twelve, twelve".

A pirate walks into a bar. The bartender says, "You know, you have a steering wheel down your pants?" The pirate says, "I know, I was just raped by a group of men who thought it would be funny to humiliate me as much as possible. The bartender then called 911 seeing that a horrible crime had just been committed.

How do you wake up lady gaga? You set her alarm clock for a reasonable hour.

what do you call a Mexican driving a plane? a pilot you were probably to racist to work that out

Two muffins are in an oven. Neither of them talk due to the fact that they are muffins and are inanimate, therefore denying them the ability to talk.

Why doesn't Harry have any arms? Because he's a Jew.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. He got hit by a semi.

Q: What happened to the fat man on the roller coaster A: The roller coaster went slightly faster due to the laws of gravity

Who won the championship last year? There was no championship

A blond, a brunette, and a red head are stranded on an island. They all die of starvation.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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