What do Kurt Cobain and a whale have in common? Both have holes in the back of their heads

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a blonde takes 1 hour to swim 100m of breaststroke.

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What is the same about a Duck and a Pickle? Neither of them can ride a bike.

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How do you stop a bus from hitting you?? You throw small children to impede the progress of the bus.

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Whats Barack Obama's favorite number ? 7

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Knock Knock Who's there? Hello there. I am Elder Young and I with the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. What would you say if someone were to offer you peace and happiness through all of eternity?

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What's the difference between a black man and a large pizza? The black man is a human being with all of man's well-deserved rights, and the large pizza is an edible item. Furthermore, the black man, if adult and employed, has the propensity to feed a family of four far longer than a large pizza can.

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge asked "Mum, why is my name Fridge?" to which she replied "Because you deserve to be in one."

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A man walks to his coathanger and shouts: "I AM GOING TO THE STORE!" his wife says not to because the Rapist 'Eggman' was out again. He says he will be careful. On his way to the store, he hears "They are the Eggmen, I am the Eggen-" but the man shouts "AND I'M THE WALRUS, SO SHUT UP AND GET OUTTA MY FACE OR I'LL KOO-KOO KOO-JOOB YOU AND YOUR CHILDREN!" Rapist and the singer became friends and found two more from Liverpool who were excellent musicians. They formed the band 'The Beatles'. The Eggman shot the Walrus in 1980 after the band's breakup.

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Whats the difference between a boy scout and a jew? A boy scout gets to come home after camp.

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A priest, a rabbi and a mullah walk into a bar. The bartender looks at the three, laughs and says "Please leave now, God is dead"

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who do we all like george goodburn

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What do you get when you cross a shark and a squid Nothing thats impossible

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What is the difference between menstrual blood and sand? You can't gargle sand.

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What did the worm a fisherman used to catch fish called when the worm killed a trout? Master Bate.

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Q: Who was shot 50 years ago? A: Abraham Lincoln was shot 50 years ago! (=

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how does chuck norris eat an apple Just like every other person

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Umm... Why would it not?

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a man walks into a bar, when he leaves he thinks he can hold his liquor and kills a mother and two children attempting to drive home.

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what is yellow and burns? -a fire

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What do you call a black guy driving a plane? A terrorist.

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why was six afraid of seven? Because seven brutally murdered six's family

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Did you hear about the guy who had his head chopped off? He's dead.

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Your at a racism seminar. You learn not to call black people the n word but you know they really deserve it

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops