How many gun shots does it take to kill you? 1..2... 3...4... Samantha reapeatedly kept shooting her enemy until she noticed that her enemy was Chuck Norris. So how many gunshots does it take to kill Chuck Norris? The world may never know.

Why did the snappy dresser take a button off of a coat? To see a button fly! NO YOU IDIOT YOU DID IT WRONG, IT'S SUPPOSED TO ABOUT ABOUT A "BUTTER FLY" OMG YOU DOLT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Why did the boy trip over the garden gnome? He didn't trip. He died of a burst artery.

Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? He got hit by a bus

What did you the blonde death amuptee child get for Christmas? Cancer.

A class of kids were bouncing basketballs in class and a woman teacher comes in and says,"No balls in the classroom please." All the boys leave the class.

girl. have you seen my duck man. yes he is with me right now girl rely you have him man. yes in my diner girl. d.i.c.k. man.f u

How does Moses like his tea? Hebrews it.

what do you get if you cross a motorway with a wheel barrow? Arrested as a wheelbarrow is not a motorised vehicle, or even a vehicle at all and therefore it is an offence to cross the motorway with it, actually it is probably an offence to cross a motorway with anything now that I come to think of it

How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They sent her to her room without dinner.

Why did the girl cry? She got hit by a bus.

Why did the dog have no legs? Because its previous owner had cut them off.

Have you seen stevie wonders new house No Neither has he

You're so ugly, when yo' mama dropped you off at school, she kissed your forehead and called you beautiful.

how do you wake up a cat? you break it.

(sniff) (sniff) It smells like gross diarrhea in here... (sniff) (sniff) ... Yeah it does

A: What did the Orange say to the Mango? B: Sup Hommie?! A: Wtf.... (awkwardly walks away)

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

why was the man afraid of the tree? Because it ate his mother!!!!!!

A guy walks into a bar

What do you call a man who beats his adopted, black children? A terrible person.

How many sheets did the Asian want on his bed? "You sheet on my bed I kill you!"

Why did John suck at sports? He was mentally retarded and had no friends.

Once upon a time, in a magical kingdom, there were too many similar jokes on anti-joke.com. One man thought he could be funny by writing a joke that referenced this, and be even funnier by referencing what he was referencing. Then he referenced that, then that, and so on until the layers of meta caused his brain to explode. Some of it landed in your mother's vagina.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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