a priest and a rabbi are walking down a road together the rabbi says: so your a priest how about that the priest says: fine ive read the bible a few times good book

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Its true... Chuck Norris has no hair on his balls. Because hair doesnt grow on steel.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

There was a scientist that was doing a social experiment with mothers and their children. The name of first kid was named candy because it was her mothers favourite thing. The second kid name was rose because it was her mothers Favourite thing. The last mother knew what was happening and said to her son "Come on Dick".

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Q: why did the dog fall down the stairs? A: Because I pushed him down.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

How long did it take Jeff, a middle-aged man with a lifelong speech-destroying lisp, to overcome his impediment? Less than ten minutes, as carbon monoxide is a colorless, odorless toxic gas that eliminates oxygen at a rapidly-acting rate inside of small areas such as the car Jeff locked himself inside.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why was Uncle Monty's head damn tasty? Because he shoved it up a horses arse when it needed a shit.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

A baby seal walks into a club.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why do blonde girls like penis? Because it tastes good

thumb_up thumb_down -15

There was 3 Men. Who had crashed their car on there way back from the Bar, All 3 of them died. Once they got to heaven, Jesus told him " The better in life you were with relationships,and staying true with one love- The better Transportation you get." Guy one got a Scooter. Guy two got a bike. And Guy 3 got a Mustang. One day, Guy 1 and 2 were on their bike and scooter. And they see Guy 3 upset. "Whats wrong? You got the best transporation in heaven!!" Guy 3 looks up at guy 1 and 2, Then says " I know I do..... But, I just seen my wife on a Skateboard."

thumb_up thumb_down -15

You thought i'd be telling you a joke. Turns out im not.. !! haha

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why did Jay-Z rob a bank? Wait, nevermind. Jay-Z didn't rob a bank.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

And then Jesus turned the water into wine. Some did not approve of this miracle "masta, whut is da reezon you did aint make this into tha coolaid? Bible files: Directors cut.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

how do u make a snooker table laugh? TICKLE ITS BALLS HAHA

thumb_up thumb_down -15

why did the black guy buy magnum condoms? because his white friend knew the cashier and thought it would be awkward for himself to buy them.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What did one apple say to the other apple? -Nothing, apples can't talk

thumb_up thumb_down -15

I can still remember the last words my brother said before he kicked the bucket. "Hey you guys,how far do you think I can kick this bucket?"

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Yo momma so fat she's obese.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting raped by a giant scorpion

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What's the difference between a pizza and a jew? A pizza is an Italian food and a jew is a human that practices the Jewish faith

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What do you call a really bad band? One with a poor guitar player, a bad bass player, sloppy drums, obnoxious vocals, and all of the songs sound the same. Or Nickelback.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being raped by a Triceratops.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: It didn't, instead it got put in to a McDonald's chicken wrap. Life is funny sometimes, and sceane

thumb_up thumb_down -17

How do you confuse a blonde? Explain the concept of time travel.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was a turkey, idiot.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops